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Give me some help here, ho!—If thou proceed
Rousillon. A Room in the Countess's Palace.
Enter Countess and Clown.
Count. Come on, sir; I shall now put you to the height of your breeding.
Člo. I will show myself highly fed, and lowly taught: I know my business is but to the court.
Count. To the court! why, what place make you special, when you put off that with such contempt? But to the court!
Clo. Truly, madam, if God have lent a man any manners, he may easily put it off at court: he that cannot make a leg, put off's cap, kiss his hand, and say nothing, has neither leg, hands, lip, nor cap; and, indeed, such a fellow, to say precisely, were not for the court: but, for me, I have an answer will serve all men.
Count. Marry, that's a bountiful answer, that fits all questions.
Clo. It is like a barber's chair, that fits all buttocks; the pin-buttock, the quatch-buttock, the brawn-buttock, or any buttock.
Count. Will your answer serve fit to all questions?
Clo. As fit as ten groats is for the hand of an attorney, as your French crown for your taffata punk, as Tib's rush for Tom's fore-finger, as a pancake for Shrove-Tuesday, a morris for May-day, as the nail to his hole, the cuckold to his horn, as a scolding quean to a wrangling knave, as the nun's lip to the friar's mouth; nay, as the pudding to his skin.
Count. Have you,
say, an answer of such fitness for all questions?
Clo. From below your duke, to beneath your constable, it will fit any question.
Count. It must be an answer of most monstrous size, that must fit all demands.
Clo. But a trifle neither, in good faith, if the learned should speak truth of it: here it is, and all that belongs to't: Ask me, if I am a courtier; it shall do you no harm to learn.
Count. To be young again, if we could: I will be a fool in question, hoping to be the wiser by your answer. I pray you, sir, are you a courtier?
Clo. O Lord, sir, ––There's a simple putting off;—more, more, a hundred of them.
Count. Sir, I am a poor friend of yours, that Clo. O Lord, sir,—Thick, thick, spare not me.
Count. I think, sir, you can eat none of this homely meat.
Clo. O Lord, sir,-Nay, put me to't, I warrant you. Count. You were lately whipped, sir, as I think. Clo. O Lord, sir,-Spare not me.
Count. Do you cry, O Lord, sir, at your whipping, and spare not me? Indeed, your 0 Lord, sir, is very sequent to your whipping; you would answer very well to a whipping, if you were but bound to't.
Clo. I ne'er had worse luck in my life, in myO Lord, sir : I see, things may serve long, but not serve ever.
Count. I play the noble housewife with the time, to entertain it so merrily with a fool.
"To be young again,] The lady censures her own levity in triAling with her jester, as a ridiculous attempt to return back to youth.
? O Lord, sir,) A ridicule on that foolish expletive of speech then in vogue at court.
Clo. O Lord, sir,-Why, there't serves well again.
Clo. Not much commendation to them.
Count. Not much employment for you: You understand me?
Clo. Most fruitfully; I am there before my legs.
Paris. A Room in the King's Palace.
Enter BERTRAM, Lafeu, and PAROLLES. Laf. They say, miracles are past; and we have our philosophical persons, to make modern and familiar things, supernatural and causeless. Hence is it, that we make trifles of terrors; ensconcing ourselves into seeming knowledge, when we should submit ourselves to an unknown fear.4
Par. Why, 'tis the rarest argument of wonder, that hath shot out in our latter times.
Ber. And so 'tis.
modern-] i. e. common, ordinary.
-authentick fellows,] The epithet authentick was in our author's time particularly applied to the learned.
Par. Why, there 'tis; so say I too.
Par. It is, indeed: if you will have it in showing, you shall read it in, What do you call there?
Laf. A showing of a heavenly effect in an earthly actor.
Par. That's it I would have said; the very same.
Laf. Why, your dolphin is not lustier:6 'fore me I speak in respect
Par. Nay, 'tis strange, 'tis very strange, that is the brief and the tedious of it; and he is of a most facinorous spirit, that will not acknowledge it to be the
Laf. Very hand of heaven.
Par. And debile minister, great power, great transcendence: which should, indeed, give us a further use to be made, than alone the recovery of the king, as to be-Laf. Generally thankful.
Enter King, HELENA, and Attendants. Par. I would have said it; you say well: Here comes the king.
Laf. Lustick, as the Dutchman says: I'll like a
6 Why, your dolphin is not lustier:] By dolphin is meant the dauphin, the heir apparent, and the hope of the crown of France. His title is so translated in all the old books.
facinorous spirit,] Facinorous is wicked.
Lustick :) Lustigh is the Dutch word for lusty, chearful, pleasant.
maid the better, whilst I have a tooth in my head : : Why, he's able to lead her a coranto.
Par. Mort du Vinaigre! Is not this Helen?
[Exit an Attendant.
Enter several Lords. Fair maid, send forth thine eye: this youthful parcel Of noble bachelors stand at my bestowing, O'er whom both sovereign power and father's voice I have to use: thy frank election make; Thou hast power to choose, and they none to forsake.
Hel. To each of you one fair and virtuous mistress Fall, when love please !-marry, to each, but one!"
Laf. I'd give bay Curtal, and his furniture, My mouth no more were broken' than these boys', And writ as little beard. King.
Peruse them well: Not one of those, but had a noble father.
Hel. Gentlemen, Heaven hath, through me, restor'd the king to health. All. We understand it, and thank heaven for you.
Hel. I am a simple maid; and therein wealthiest, That, I protest, I simply am a maid: Please it your majesty, I have done already:
• O'er whom both sovereign power and father's voice-] They were his wards as well as his subjects. Henley.
marry, to each, but one!) i. e. except one.
bay Curtal,] i. e. a bay, docked horse. My mouth no more were broken-) A broken mouth is a mouth which has lost part of its teeth. Johnson. VOL. III.