HE Shepherds and the Nymphs were seen
Pleading before the Cyprian Queen.
The Council for the Fair began,
Accufing the falle Creature Man.
The Brief with weighty Crimes was charg'd, On which the Pleader much enlarg'd;
That Cupid now has loft his Art,
Or blunts the Point of ev'ry Dart;
His Altar now no longer smokes,
His Mother's Aid no Youth invokes :
This tempts Free-thinkers to refine,
And bring in Doubt their Pow'rs divine; '
Now Love is dwindled to Intrigue,
And Marriage grown a Money-League.
Which Crimes aforefaid (with her Leave)
Were (as he humbly did conceive)
Against our Sov'reign Lady's Peace,
Against the Statutes in that Case,
Against her Dignity and Crown:
Then pray'd an Answer and fat down.
THE Nymphs with Scorn beheld their Foes: When the Defendant's Council rofe,
And, what no Lawyer ever lack'd,
With Impudence own'd all the Fact.
But, what the gentleft Heart would vex,
Laid all the Fault on t'other Sex.
That modern Love is no fuch Thing
As what thofe ancient Poets fing;
A Fire celeftial, chafte, refin'd,
Conceiv'd and kindled in the Mind,
Which having found an equal Flame,
Unites, and both becomes the fame,
In diff'rent Breasts together burn,
Together both to Ashes turn.
But Women now feel no fuch Fire,
And only know the grofs Defire;
Their Paffions move in lower Spheres,
Where-e'er Caprice or Folly steers.
A Dog, a Parrot, or an Ape,
Or fome worse Brute in human Shape,
Engrofs the Fancies of the Fair,
The few foft Moments they can fpare,
From Vifits to receive and pay,
From Scandal, Politicks, and Play,
From Fans, and Flounces, and Brocades,
From Equipage and Park-parades,
From all the thousand Female Toys,
From ev'ry Trifle that employs
The out or infide of their Heads,
Between their Toylets and their Beds.
IN a dull Stream, which moving flow
You hardly fee the Current flow,
If a small Breeze obftructs the Course,
It whirls about for want of Force,
And in its narrow Circle gathers
Nothing but Chaff, and Straws, and Feathers:
The Current of a Female Mind
Stops thus, and turns with ev'ry Wind;
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Thus whirling round, together draws
Fools, Fops, and Rakes, for Chaff and Straws.
Hence we conclúde, no Womens Hearts
Are won by Virtue, Wit, and Parts ;
Nor are the Men of Sense to blame,
For Breafts incapable of Flame:
The Fault must on the Nymphs be plac'd,
Grown fo corrupted in their Taste.
THE Pleader having spoke his best,
Had Witness ready to attest,
Who fairly could on Oath depose,
When Questions on the Fact arose,
That ev'ry Article was true;
Nor further thofe Deponents knew:
Therefore he humbly would infift,
The Bill might be with Cofts dismist.
THE Caufe appear'd of fo much Weight,
That Venus from the Judgment-Seat,
Defir'd them not to talk fo loud,
Else she must interpofe a Cloud :
For if the Heav'nly Folk fhould know
Thefe Pleadings in the Courts below,
That Mortals here difdain to love,
She ne'er could fhew her Face above.
For Gods, their Betters, are too wise
To value that which Men despise.
And then, faid fhe, my Son and I
Muft ftrole in Air 'twixt Earth and Sky;
Or elfe, fhut out from Heav'n and Earth,
Fly to the Sea, my Place of Birth;
There live with daggl'd Mermaids pent,
And keep on Fish perpetual Lent.
BUT fince the Cafe appear'd so nice,
She thought it beft to take Advice.
The Mufes, by their King's Permiffion,
Tho' Foes to Love, attend the Seffion,
And on the Right Hand took their Places
In Order; on the Left, the Graces:
To whom she might her Doubts propose
On all Emergencies that rofe.
The Mufes oft were feen, to frown;
The Graces half afham'd look down;
And 'twas obferv'd, there were but few
Of either Sex, among the Crew,
Whom the or her Affeffors knew.
The Goddess foon began to fee
Things were not ripe for a Decree,
And faid fhe must confult her Books,
The Lovers Fleta's, Bractons, Cokes.
First to a dapper Clerk fhe beckon❜d,
To turn to Ovid, Book the Second;
She then referr'd them to a Place
In Virgil (vide Dido's Cafe;)
As for Tibullus's Reports,
They never pass'd for Law in Courts :
For Cowley's Brief, and Pleas of Waller,
Still their Authority is fmaller.
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