On Captain Grose

MR. ERSKINE.

Collected Harry stood awee,
Then open'd out his arm, man;
His lordship sat wi' ruefu' e'e,

And ey'd the gathering storm, man:
Like wind-driv'n hail it did assail,

Or torrents owre a linn, man;
The Bench sae wise, lift up their eyes,
Half-wauken'd wi' the din, man.

Lines

WRITTEN UNDER THE PICTURE OF MISS BURNS

‘EASE, ye prudes, your envious railing,

CE

Lovely Burns has charms-confess :

True it is, she had one failing,

Had a woman ever less?

Ο

On Miss Jean Scott, of Ayr

H! had each Scot of ancient times

Been, Jeanie Scott, as thou art,
The bravest heart on English ground
Had yielded like a coward!

On Captain Francis Grose.

THE CELEBRATED ANTIQUARY

HE Devil got notice that Grose was a-dying,

flying;

But when he approach'd where poor Francis lay moaning,

And saw each bedpost with its burden a-groaning,
Astonish'd confounded! cries Satan, "By God,
I'll want him, ere I take such a damnable load!"

On Elphinstone's Translation

of Martial's "Epigrams

THOU whom Poesy abhors,

Whom Prose had turned out of doors,

Heard'st thou yon groan?-proceed no further,

'Twas laurell'd Martial calling "Murther."

O

LORD, when hunger pinches sore,

Do Thou stand us in need,

And send us from Thy bounteous store,
A tup or wether head! Amen.

Grace after Meat

LORD, since we have feasted thus,
Which we so little merit,

Let Meg now take away the flesh,

And Jock bring in the spirit! Amen.

The Toad-Eater

HAT of Earls with whom you have supt,

WHAT

And of Dukes that you dined with yestreen?

Lord! a louse, Sir, is still but a louse,

Though it crawl on the curls of a Queen.

On the Laird of Laggan

Impromptu

ON AN INNKEEPER NAMED BACON, WHO INTRUDed himself INTO ALL COMPANIES

AT

T Brownhill we always get dainty good cheer, And plenty of bacon each day in the year; We've a' things that's nice, and mostly in season, But why always Bacon-come, give me a reason?

On Sensibility

ADDRESSED TO A LADY WHOM THE AUTHOR FEARED

R

HE HAD OFFENDED

USTICITY'S ungainly form

May cloud the highest mind;
But when the heart is nobly warm,
The Good excuse will find.

Propriety's cold cautious rules
Warm fervour may o'erlook;

But spare poor sensibility

The ungentle, harsh rebuke.

On the Laird of Laggan

HEN Morine, deceased, to the Devil went down,

WHE

'Twas nothing would serve him but Satan's own

crown;

"Thy fool's head," quoth Satan, "that crown shall

wear never,

I grant thou'rt as wicked, but not quite so clever."

MY

Lines inscribed on a Platter

at Roslin Inn

Y blessings on ye, honest wife!
I ne'er was here before:

Ye've wealth o' gear for spoon and knife—
Heart could not wish for more.

Heaven keep you clear of sturt and strife,
Till far ayont fourscore,

And by the Lord o' death and life,
I'll ne'er gae by your door!

BL

On John M'Murdo, Esq.

LEST be M'Murdo to his latest day,
No envious cloud o'ercast his evening ray;

No wrinkle furrow'd by the hand of Care,
Nor ever Sorrow add one silver hair!
Oh, may no son the father's honour stain,
Nor ever daughter give the mother pain!

To Miss Ainslie

WHO WAS LOOKING UP THE TEXT IN CHURCH

FAIR maid, you need not take the hint,

Nor idle texts pursue:

'Twas "guilty sinners that he meantNot "angels" such as you!

H

The Keekin'-Glass

WOW daur ye ca' me "Howlet-faced,"

Ye ugly, glow'ring spectre?

My face was but the keekin'-glass,

An' there ye saw your picture.

EAR

Rough Roads

To a Painter

D -, I'll gie ye some advice,

You'll tak it no uncivil:

You shouldna paint at angels mair,
But try and paint the Devil.

To paint an Angel's kittle wark,
Wi' Nick, there's little danger;
You'll easy draw a lang-kent face,
But no sae weel a stranger.

Rough Roads

''M now arrived, thanks to the gods!

A certain sign that makin' roads

Is no this people's study.

Altho' I'm not wi' Scripture cramm'd,

I'm sure the Bible says,

That heedless sinners shall be damn'd
Unless they mend their ways.