I N° 16. Monday, March 19, 1710-11. Quid verum atque decens curo & rogo, & omnis in boc HOR. I Ep. i. II. Sum. What right, what true, what fit, we justly call, POPE. HAVE received a letter, defiring me to be very fatirical upon the little muff that is now in fashion; another informs me of a pair of filver garters buckled below the knee, that have been lately feen at the Rainbow coffeehoufe in Fleet-freet; a third fends me an heavy complaint against fringed gloves. To be brief, there is scarce an ornament of either fex which one or other of my correfpondents has not inveighed against with fome bitterness, and recommended to my obfervation. I must, therefore, once for all, inform my readers, that it is not my intention to fink the dignity of this my Paper with reflections upon red-heels or top-knots, but rather to enter into the paffions of mankind, and to correct thofe depraved fentiments that give birth to all thofe little extravagancies which appear in their outward drefs and behaviour. Foppish and fantastic ornaments are only indications of vice, not criminal in themselves. Extinguish vanity in the mind, and you naturally retrench the little fuperfluities of Garniture and Equipage. The bloffoms will fall of themselves, when the root that nourishes them is destroyed. I fhall therefore, as I have faid, apply my remedies to the firft feeds and principles of an affected drefs, without defcending to the dress itfelf; though at the fame time I must own, that I have thoughts of creating an officer under me, to be intitled The Cenfor of Small Wares, and of allotting him one day in a week for the execution of fuch his office. An operator of this nature might act under me, with the same regard as a furgeon to a physician; the one might be employed in healing thofe blotches and tumours which break out in the body, while the other is sweetening the blood, and rectifying the conftitution. To speak truly, the young people of both fexes are fo wonderfully apt to fhoot out into long swords or fweeping trains, bushy headdreffes or full bottomed periwigs, with feveral other incumbrances of dress, that they stand in need of being pruned very frequently, left they fhould be oppreffed with ornaments, and overrun with the luxuriancy of their habits. I am much in doubt, whether I fhould give the preference to a quaker that is trimmed close, and almoft cut to the quick, or to a beau that is loaden with fuch a redundance of excrefcences. I must therefore defire my correfpondents to let me know how they approve my project, and whether they think the erecting of fuch a Petty CENSORSHIP may not turn to the emolument of the Public; for I would not do any thing of this nature rafhly and without advice. There There is another fet of correspondents to whom I must addrefs myself in the fecond place; I mean fuch as fill their letters with private fcandal, and black accounts of particular perfons and families. The world is fo full of ill-nature, that I have lampoons fent me by people who cannot spell, and fatires composed by those who scarce know how to write. By the last post in particular I received a packet of fcandal which is not legible; and have a whole bundle of letters in women's hands, that are full of blots and calumnies, infomuch, that when I fee the name Calia, Phillis, Paftora, or the like, at the bottom of a fcrawl, I conclude on course that it brings me fome account of a fallen virgin, a faithlefs wife, or an amorous widow. I muft therefore inform these my correfpondents, that it is not my design to be a publisher of intrigues and cuckoldoms, or to bring little infamous stories out of their present lurking-holes into broad day-light. If I attack the vicious, I fhall only fet upon them in a body; and will not be provoked by the worst ufage I can receive from others, to make an example of any particular criminal. In fhort, I have fo much of a Drawcanfir* in me, that I fhall pass over a fingle foe to charge whole armies. It is not Lais or Silenus, but the harlot and the drunkard, whom I fhall endeavour to expofe; and fhall confider the crime as it ap The name of a character in "The Rehearsal." pears pears in a species, not as it is circumstanced in an individual. I think it was Caligula, who wished the whole city of Rome had but one neck, that he might behead them at a blow. I fhall do, out of humanity, what that emperor would have done in the cruelty of his temper, and aim every ftroke at a collective body of offenders. At the fame time I am very fenfible, that nothing spreads a Paper like private calumny and defamation; but as my Speculations are not under this neceffity, they are not expofed to this temptation. In the next place I must apply myself to my party correfpondents, who are continually teazing me to take notice of one another's proceedings. How often am I afked by both fides, if it is poffible for me to be an unconcerned SPECTATOR of the rogueries that are committed by the party which is oppofite to him that writes the letter. About two days fince, I was reproached with an old Grecian law, that forbids any man to ftand as neuter, or a looker-on in the divifions of his country. However, as I am very fenfible my Paper would lofe its whole effect, fhould it run into the outrages of a party, I fhall take care to keep clear of every thing which looks that way. If I can any way affuage private inflammations, or allay public ferments, I shall apply myself to it with my utmost endeavours; but will never let my heart reproach me with having done any thing towards increasing thofe feuds and animofities, that extinguish reVOL. I. ligion, H ligion, deface government, and make a nation miferable. What I have faid under the three foregoing heads, will, I am afraid, very much retrench the number of my correfpondents. I fhall therefore acquaint my reader, that if he has started any hint which he is not able to purfue, if he has met with any furprifing ftory which he does not know how to tell, if he has discovered any epidemical vice which has efcaped my obfervation, or has heard of any uncommon virtue which he would defire to publifh; in fhort, if he has any materials that can furnish out an innocent diverfion, I fhall promife him my best affistance in the working of them up for a pub lic entertainment. This Paper my reader will find was intended for an answer to a multitude of correfpondents: but I hope he will pardon me if I fingle out one of them in particular who has made me fo very humble a request, that I cannot forbear complying with it. 'SIR, 'I To the SPECTATOR. March 15, 1710-11. AM at prefent fo unfortunate, as to have nothing to do but to mind my own businefs; and therefore beg of you that you will be pleased to put me into fome small post un⚫der you. I obferve that you have appointed your printer and publisher to receive letters ' and |