ally pushing it on, without allowing it to reft on any particular image. Nothing therefore is more unnatural than the thoughts and conceptions of fuch a man, which are feldom occafioned either by the company he is in, or any of thofe objects which are placed before him. While you fancy he is admiring a beautiful woman, it is an even wager that he is folving a position in Euclid; and while you may imagine he is reading the Paris Gazette, it is far from being impoffible, that he is pulling down and rebuilding the front of his country-houfe.

At the fame time that I am endeavouring to expofe this weakness in others, I fhall readily confefs that I once laboured under the fame infirmity myself. The method I took to conquer it was a firm refolution to learn something from whatever I was obliged to fee, or hear. There is a way of thinking, if a man can attain to it, by which he may ftrike somewhat out of any thing. I can at prefent obferve those starts of good fenfe, and ftruggles of unimproved reafon in the converfation of a clown, with as much fatisfaction as the most fhining periods of the most finished orator; and can make a fhift to command my attention at a puppet-show or an opera, as well as at Hamlet or Othello. I always make one of the company I am in; for though I fay little myself, my attention to others, and thofe nods of approbation which I never bestow unmerited, fufficiently fhew that I am among them. Whereas WILL HONEYCOMB, though a fellow of good fenfe, is every day doing

and

and faying an hundred things, which he afterwards confeffes, with a well bred franknefs, were somewhat mal a propos, and undefigned.

I chanced the other day to go into a coffeehouse, where WILL was standing in the midft of feveral auditors, whom he had gathered round him, and was giving them on account of the person and character of MOLL HINTON*. My appearance before him just put him in mind of me, without making him reflect that I was actually prefent. So that keeping his eyes full upon me, to the great surprise of his audience, he broke off his first harangue, and proceeded thus:Why now there's my friend, (mentioning me by my name) he is a fellow that thinks a great ' deal, but never opens his mouth; I warrant 'you he is now thrusting his fhort face into fome coffee-houfe about Change. I was his bail in the time of the Popish Plot, when he 'was taken up for a Jefuit.' If he had looked on me a little longer, he had certainly defcribed me fo particularly, without ever confidering what led him into it, that the whole company muft neceffarily have found me out; for which reafon, remembering the old proverb, Out of fight out of mind, I left the room; and upon meeting him an hour afterwards, was afked by him, with a great deal of good-humour, in what part of the world I lived, that he had not feen me these three days.

Monfieur Bruyere has given us the character

*«C'est une jeune beaute de Londres." LE SPECT. Tom. I. Ixi Difc. p. 397, Note.

Gg 4

of

of an abfent man* with a great deal of humour, which he has pushed to an agreeable extravagance; with the heads of it I fhall conclude my prefent Paper.

Menalcas (fays that excellent author) comes ⚫ down in a morning, opens his door to go out, but 'fhuts it again, because he perceives that he has his night-cap on; and examining himself further, finds that he is but half-fhaved, that he has stuck his fword on his right fide, that his ftockings are about his heels, and that his fhirt is over his breeches. When he is dreffed he goes to court, comes into the drawing-room, and walking bolt-upright under a branch of candlesticks, his wig is caught up by one of them, and hangs dangling in the air. All the • courtiers fall a laughing, but Menalcas laughs ⚫ louder than any of them, and looks about for the perfon that is the jeft of the company: Coming down to the court gate he finds a coach, which taking for his own, he whips in' to it; and the coachman drives off, not doubting but he carries his mafter. As foon as he ftops, Menalcas throws himself out of the coach, croffes the court, afcends the ftaircafe, and runs through all the chambers with the greatest familiarity; repofes himself on a couch, and fancies himself at home. The mafter of the houfe at last comes in; Menalcas 'rifes to receive him, and defires him to fit

"On dit que c'est le feu Comte de Brancas." Voyez Menagiana, Tom. II. p. 334, &c. LE SPECTATEUR, ut fupra. ⚫ down;

down; he talks, mufes, and then talks again, The gentleman of the house is tired and amazed; Menalcas is no lefs fo, but is every moment in hopes that his impertinent guest will at laft end his tedious vifit. Night comes on, when Menalcas is hardly undeceived.

When he is playing at backgammon, he calls for a full glafs of wine and water; it is his turn to throw; he has the box in one hand, and his glass in the other; and being ex'tremely dry, and unwilling to lofe time, he fwallows down both the dice, and at the fame ⚫ time throws his wine into the tables. He writes a letter, and flings the fand into the ink-bottle; he writes a fecond, and mistakes the fuperfcription. A nobleman receives one of them, and upon opening it reads as follows: “ I "would have you, honeft Jack, immediately upon the receipt of this, take in hay enough "to ferve me the winter." His farmer re'ceives the other, and is amazed to fee in it, My Lord, I received your Grace's com- . mands, with an entire fubmiffion to" - If he is at an entertainment, you may fee the pieces of bread continually multiplying round his plate. It is true the reft of the company want it, as well as their knives and forks, which Menalcas does not let them keep long. Sometimes in a morning he puts his whole family in an hurry, and at last goes out without being able to ftay for his coach or dinner, and for that day, you may fee him in every of the town, except the very place where

66

part

'he

he had appointed to be upon a business of importance. You would often take him for every thing that he is not; for a fellow quite ftupid, for he hears nothing; for a fool, for he talks to himself, and has an hundred grimaces and motions in his head, which are altogether involuntary; for a proud man, for he looks full upon you, and takes no notice of your faluting him. The truth of it is, his eyes are open, but he makes no ufe of them, and neither fees you, nor any man, nor any thing elfe. He came once from his country - houfe, and his own footmen undertook to rob him, and fucceeded. They held a flambeau to his throat, and bid him deliver his purfe; he did fo, and coming home told his friends he had been robbed; they defired to know the particulars, “ Ask "my fervants, (fays Menalcas) for they were "with me."

N° 78. Wednesday, May 30, 1711.

Cum talis fis, utinam nofter effes!
Cou'd we but call fo great a genius ours!

"

X*.

HE following letters are fo pleasant, that

TH

I doubt not but the reader will be as much diverted with them as I was. I have nothing to do in this day's entertainment, but taking the fentence from the end of the Cambridge

By Mr. EUSTACE BUDGELL. See SPECT. Vol. VII. N° 555.

letter,