WHITECHAPEL, 1888.

FIRST MEMBER OF "CRIMINAL CLASS." "FINE BODY O' MEN, THE PER-LEECE! "

SECOND DITTO. "UNCOMMON FINE!-IT'S LUCKY FOR HUS AS THERE'S SECH A BLOOMIN' FEW ON 'EM!!!"

"I have to observe that the Metropolitan Police have not large reserves doing nothing and ready to meet emergencies; but every man has his duty assigned to him, and I can only strengthen the Whitechapel district by drawing men from duty in other parts of the Metropolis."-Sir Charles Warren's Statement. "There is one Policeman to every seven hundred persons."-Vide Recent Statistics.

Kennel Huntsman. "A MAN BROUGHT THIS HERE LAST NIGHT, BUT HE DIDN'T LEAVE NO MESSAGE TO SAY IF IT WERE FOR RIDIN' OR BILIN'." [Delight of our new M.F.H., Mr. Popple, who has given £40 for it to carry a Whip.

ROBERT'S LONG WACATION.

time; but, when night came, we went to the Theater, so as to have a nice evening's emusement, to cheer us both hup. Ah, that was a nice evening's emusement that was!

I went carefully through the warious statements in the Noosepapers, and picked out a Play that as the Times said "thrilled the House!" and, as the Advertiser said, "would attract all playgoers;" and, as the Daily Noose said, "held the audience breathless." So off we went to the "Liesee' em," and there we sat for a hole hower a seeing sitch a xhibishun of disgusting orrers as we no more. We coudn't stand no more of it, but went out in the middel of the werry wust part, feeling quite hill, and warked home a grumbling and a growling all the way at being so shamefoolly deseaved by the jockular papers, and wundring how any man coud have taken sitch a lot of trubbel to both look and hact more like a wild beest than a man.

However, a nice little bankwet that my partner had prepaird as a surprise, and a partickler nice glass of ot Rum and water, enabled us to sup full of hoysters insted of "full of orrors," as sumbody says, and we was abel to bannish 'em from our thorts and to sleep the sleep of the hinnercent. ROBERT.

LARST Weak I told you I'd kontinuew in my nex. This is my nex and I rekummense. The nex day, it looking rayther inclined to be fine, as if the rain was beginning to get rayther ashamed of itself for doing its werry best to spile all the crops, and all surten peepel's tempers, and other peepel's best close, I perswaded my wife to go with me for a wark on the bewtifool Tems Embankment, and there we strolled about in the lovely gardins for a nour or two, and I wentured to say, as the tooth ake was much better, that the nice looking neether of us never seed afore and fondly opes as we shall never see surroundins, with the River a flowing by, reminded me of that appy day in Grinnidge Park, when I arsked her to share my umbel fortunes for wheel or for wo. She was ewidently pleased, and a smile lited up her ample feeters, when, as ill-luck woud have it, jest at that werry moment, down came one of them orful downpores as seems to have bin trying all this summer to beat the record, and allers succeeding, Well, after that day's xperience, I must confess that, bewtifool as is the well kep Gardens, and the floing River, and the nice cumferal seats, the Tems Embankment is not a conwenient plaice to seleck to be cort with your best Beloved, with jest the remanes of a bad toothake, in a drenching storm of rain and thunder and litening, and with her best dress on. So we have not repeated that xperiment. The nex day we spent at the Great British Mewseum, and we both agreed that it seemed a great pitty that the Country was so werry pore that they coudn't afford to have the Stattys mended. There was several of the most bewtifoollest of 'em all as had either a harm, or a leg, or an and or two, broke rite off, and one of 'em had his nose nocked rite off, and, aperiently, no attemp being maid to mend any on 'em. Them as is without heds of coarse represents peeple as was beheded afore their warious deaths, so the same fault cannot farely be found with them. We coudn't, neether on us, at all hunderstand why so many on 'em was not allowed to dress theirselves propperly afore they had their stattys taken. Mrs. ROBERT ewen going so far as to say as she thort as sum on 'em, speshally the ladies, ort to have bin ashamed of thereselves, let alone the chance of catching werry bad colds. Of course it rained pretty hard before we got home; but we had not werry far to go, so we did not git so werry wet this time, fortnitly. The day after was much like the day afore, so, as I coudn't go out, I purtended to be a reading, and slep a good deal of the

THE COLD WEATHER HAS SET IN!-How to warm yourself. Sit near our FURNISS, when he is giving his lecture on Portrait-painting. As suitable to a wintry entertainment, the lecture is illustrated by "Slides." In spite of being near the FURNISS, the views are not dissolving; in fact our artist has positively declared that he sees no reason for changing his views.

AN IRISH DELICACY.-The Parnellite Members are declared by a contemporary to give themselves the airs of exceptional education, and delicacy of constitution. Let them, then, be so careful of their constitution, as closely to confine the pursuit of their aims and ends to constitutional methods.

INTERESTING TO GEOLOGICAL AND MEDICAL STUDENTS.-In future, no one will be eligible for the Swiney Lectureship who has not gone through a regular course of BACON.

66

ON THE STUMP.

CHURCH AND STAGE.-Strictly speaking, the word "Mummer" hurt by anything written against Mummers and mumming. Can cannot be applied to an Actor, and both in the title Mummer's Wife it be true that HENRY IRVING refused to speak at the Church and in the recent article "Mummer Worship," with which Mr. IRVING did well," though perhaps not wisely, to be angry," the word "Mummer" is used contemptuously of the regular professional Actor. But such application shows ignorance. 66 Momerie" is defined in the best French theatrical dictionary as, "Mascarade, bouffonnerie, déguisement de gens masqués pour aller danser, jouer, se réjouir." And the first Mummer was Momus, the professional jester, the Merry Andrew, the Tom Fool of the Court of King Jove "in the air, Of the skies Lord Mayor." Let those whom the Mummer's cap fits, wear it, but most certainly neither Mr. IRVING nor Mr. WYNDHAM need be

Congress simply because he would have been brought in contact with Momerie in any shape? If so, it is a pity, as Momerie in his own shape at the Congress was in excellent form; and though with Momerie " Mum's the word," yet on this occasion he spoke out strongly, and did his best with "Pessimism." The Church Congress, owing to the abstention of the leading Tragedian (his health in a glass of "Pommery," which rhymes to Momerie!"), felt some delicacy in dealing with the subject of IRVING and the Irvingites, and so let it alone. But-aha!-a time will come !