there were many scruples in his mind with regard to my travelling, as many thought my health and behavior not adequate to it.

February 5th; I set out for home, and in the town of Somers, I missed my road and got lost in a great wilde ness, and the snow being about two feet deep, on which was a sharp icy crust; after some time, as the path divided into branches, so that I could not distinguish one plainer than another, and those extending over the woods in all directions for the purpose of getting ship timber, I went round and round about, tiil I was chilled with cold, and saw nothing but death before me-at a distance I could see a village, but could discern no way to it, neither could I find the passage out, by which I entered; and, night drawing on, no person can tell my feelings, except one who has been in a similar situation. I at last heard a sound, and by following it perhaps about a mile or more, found a man driving a team, who gave me a direction so that I could find a foot path made by some school boys, by which I might happen to get through: toward this I proceeded, and by means of leaping my horse over logs, frequently stamping a path for the horse through the snow banks, with much difficulty made my way, and late at night got to my brother-in-law's, in Tolland, and the next day went home, and my soul was happy in God. I am glad that I went, although there was great opposition against me on every side; I am everywhere spoken evil of, &c. I feel the worth of souls to lie near my heart, and my duty still to be to preach the pel; with a determination to do so, God being my helper.

gos

20th. I dreamed, that in a strange house I sat by the fire, a messenger came in and said, "there are three ministers come from England, and in a few moments will pass by this way." I followed him out, and he disappeared. I ran over a wood pile and jumped upon a log, to have a fair view of them; presently three men came over a hill from the west towards me; the foremost dismounted; the other two, one of whom was on a white horse, the other on a reddish one; both, with the three horses, disappeared. I said to the first, "who are you?" He replied, "John Wesley," and walked towards the EAST: he turned round, and looking me in the face, said, "God has called you to preach the gospel; you have been a long time between hope and fear, but there is a dispensation of the

gospel committed to you. Woe unto you if you preach not the gospel.

I was struck with horror and amazement to think how he should know the exercise of my mind, when I knew he had never heard of me before! I still followed him to the eastward, and expressed an observation for which he with his countenance reproved me, for the better improvement of my time. At length we came to a log house where negroes lived; the door being open, he attempted twice to go in, but the smoke prevented him; he said, "You may go in, if you have a mind, and if not, follow me." I followed him a few rods, where was an old log house two stories high, in one corner of which my parents looked out at a window, and, said they to him, "Who are you?" He replied, John Wesley; well, said they, "what be comes of doubting Christians?" He replied, "there are many serious Christians who are afraid of death. They dare not believe they are converted, for fear of being deceived; and they are afraid to disbelieve it, lest they should grieve the Spirit of God, so they live, and die, and go into the other world, and their souls to heaven with a guard of angels. I then said, "will the day of judgment come as we read, and the sun and moon fall from heaven, and the earth and works be burnt?" To which he answered, "It is not for you to know the times and seasons, which God hath put in his own power, but read the word of God with attention, and let that be your guide.

I said, "are you more than fifty five?" He replied, "do you not remember of reading an account of my death, in the history of my life?" I turned partly round, in order to consider, and after I had recollected it, I was about to answer him, yes; when I looked, and behold he was gone, and I saw him no more. It set me to shaking and quaking to such a degree that it waked me up.

N. B. The appearance of his person was the very same as he who appeared to me three times in the dream when I was abs thirteen years of age, and who said that he would come to me again, &c.

March, 14th. About this time my uncle made me the offer of a horse, to wait a year for the payment, provided I would get borsmen; four of the society willingly offered. O! from what an anexpected quarter was this door opened! My parents seeing my way

thus beginning to open, and my resolution to go forward; with loving entreaties and strong arguments strove to prevail against it.But as they promised sometime before, not to restrain me by their authority, in case a door should open from another quarter, (they not expecting it would) and seeing they could not prevail on me to tarry, they gave up the point-and gave me some articles of clothing and some money for my journey.

Not having as yet attempted to preach from a text, but only exercised my gifts in the way of exhortation, I obtained a letter of recommendation concerning my moral conduct; this was all the credential I had.

About the 10th of last month, I dreamed that C. Spry received a letter from Jesse Lee, that he wanted help in the province of Maine, and the said C. S. and L. Macombs concluded to send me. N. B. These were the two preachers who afterwards signed the above recommendation.

1796, March 30th; This morning early, I set out for Rhode Island, in quest of J. Lee, who was to attend a quarterly meeting there as I was coming away we joined in prayer, taking leave of each other, and as I got on my road I looked about and espied my mother looking after me until I got out of sight; this caused me some tender feelings afterwards.

Until this time I have enjoyed the comforts of a kind father's house; and oh! must I now become a wanderer and stranger upon the face of the earth until I get to my long home!

During this day's journey, these words of our Lord came into my mind, "the foxes have holes and the birds of the air have nests, but the son of man hath not where to lay his head."

The language of my heart is, what is past I know, what is to come I know not. Lord! bless me in the business I am set out upon. I feel more than ever that God has called me to this work. April 1st. Upon my arrival at Cranston, in Rhode Island, J found that J. Lee had gone to Boston; I accordingly set out after him and found the preachers' boarding house in Boston, and they told me that Lee had gone to the east, and that I could not overtake him short of two or three hundred miles, and their advice was to go to Warren, in R. I., with Thomas Coope, a native of Manchester,

who was going to set out that afternoon-accordingly I joined him in company thirty-six miles to East-town.

Sunday 3d. This day, for the first time, I gave out a text be fore a Methodist preacher, and I being young both in years and ministry, the expectations of many were raised, who did not bear with my weakness and strong doctrine, but judged me very hard, and would not consent that I should preach there any more for some time.

Having travelled a few days with T. C., we came to Reynham. where attempting to preach I was seized with a sudden illness, such as affected me at Warehouse-point, with the loss of sight and strength, so that I was constrained to give over, and T. C. finished the meeting, after which lots were cast, to see whether I should pass the Sabbath here, or go to East-town-it turned up for me to tarry here, which I accordingly did, and held three meetings, which were very solemn.

I met T. C., who said if I was so minded I might return home; which I declining, he said, "I do not believe God has called you to preach." I asked him why, he replied, 1st, your health; 2nd, your gifts; 3d, your grace; 4th, your learning; 5th, sobriety; in all these you are not equivalent to the task. I replied, enough! Lord! what am I but a poor worm of the dust, struggling for life and happiness."

The time now drawing near when I expected to leave these parts, the society where I first attempted to give out a text desired to hear me again; and contrary to my entreaties, T. C. appointed and constrained me to go, threatening me if I refused. Accordingly I went and gave out these words, "I am therefore become your enemy, because I tell you the truth!" Gal. iv. 16.

June 30th; I rode 24 miles and preached once, and saw J. Lee, the presiding elder, who had just returned from the east-I gave him my recommendation.

July 3d. This evening, our quarterly meeting being over, from the representation that was given of me by T. C., I received a dismission from the circuit, with orders to go home, which was as follows;

"We have had brother Lorenzo Dow, the bearer hereof, travelling

*He is since expelled the connection.

on Warren circuit, these three months past. In several places he was liked by a great many people; at other places, he was not liked so well, and at a few places they were not willing he should preach at all; we have therefore thought it necessary to advise him to return home for a season, until a further recommendation can be obtained from the society and preachers of that circuit.

JOHN VANIMAN,

THOMAS COOPE.

Rhode Island, July 3d, 1796.

JESSE LEE, Elder.

To C. Spry, and the Methodists in Coventry."

The time has been when I could easier have met death than this discharge-two or three handkerchiefs were soon wet with tears; my heart was broke; I expostulated with them, and besought him for farther employment, but, apparently in vain. The next morning, as we were about parting, he said, "if you are so minded, you may come to Greenwich quarterly meeting next Sunday, on your way home.

This evening I preached in Greenwich court house, as I once dreamed, and the assembly and place looked natural to me.

After travelling though Sapatchet, Smithfield, (in which I formed a class, for the first time) Providence, and Wickford, where attending a prayer-meeting among the baptists, I asked liberty to speak, which seemed to give them a surprise, and after some time, they said, if I had a message from God they had no right to hinder me. I spoke a few moments to their attention, and their leader seemed satisfied, and bid me God-speed.

From thence to South Kingston, I set out for my native town; at which I arrived, and met my friends, who were glad to see me. My parents asked me whether I was not convinced that I did wrong in going? I told them, no; but was glad: others began to mock, and cry out, this man began to build, and was not able to finish.

After a few days, I set out for Granville, to meet C. Spry, who gave me a written license, and orders to come to the ensuing quar terly meeting at Enfield, where he would give me a credential for conference; and if I were so minded, and brother Cankey willing, I might travel Tolland circuit until that time.

But as the circuit extended through my native town, I thought