XCVIII.

Peruse the history of all past ages;

Read Plutarch, Aikin, all books of biography;

Next learn the sentiments of all the

sages

Whose fame is handed to us by orthography; Consult all people in the various stages

Of life, in every place known to geography, Before you yield to wedded love's dominion; For I intend to give you no opinion.

XCIX.

At length the Count, one night with wine light-headed, Discovered thus the cause of his distresses:

"My sweet Rebecca, when with me you wedded,

"It seems you thought, unless I make bad guesses,

"That I had got a title when I said it;

"And counted yourself one among Countesses. "Love made me then deceive: but now my glory "Is at a dis-count-I'm but plain Signore.

C.

"I, likewise, told you something of a bishop : ""Tis true I once had such a worthy uncle; "But Death, long since, has made him part with his shop; "Dim is that face where shone each bright carbuncle ! "What loaves and fish he had contrived to fish up,

"He left, before his cup of life was drunk all, "To be divided by his natural progenies,

"And died, as some say, poorer than Diogenes.

CI.

"The truth is that my only expectations

"Are from the fortune your mamma must give you." His hearer tittered, spite of her vexations,

And gave him this droll answer: "To relieve you "From all mistakes, good sir, I crave your patience; "And as I've now no reason to deceive you,

"I must declare my fortune's not a livre

"You stare!-no, 'pon my honor, not a stiver.

CII.

"The woman whom you took for my progenitrix "Was nought to me, except as sprung from Adam. "We only played a farce, composed of many tricks,

"For which, as manager, I payed old madam; "In short we were quite competent to any tricks, "And counterfeited ailments till we had 'em ;

"Hoping some gull of fortune to entangle;

"But I've been bit: and now don't let us wrangle.

CIII.

"How now! you see that I am in good humour, "And, surely, I have cause to feel some fury. "Your nether lip is swelling like a tumour.

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Upon my word, you would succeed at Drury, "As an Othello, you're so like a true Moor: "I leave this matter to a judge and jury.— "What a fine-tragic roll—your eyes have got!— “Oh—I shall-burst with laughing-on this spot!

CIV.

"Now only think of all the monstrous trouble "We've had with you in this unfair affair; "Poor dear mamma compelled to grow quite double, "While I her singular double dealings share; "And then to find we have but caught a bubble! "I went so far as to make people stare,

Painting my fine complexion white and yellow; "And all for you,-you unreasonable fellow!

CV.

"Oh, the deceivers that seem smooth as silk,
"And bristle into porcupines next day!
"I do think Hope is now more apt to bilk
"Than ever, and leads people more astray.
""Tis certainly enough to turn the milk

"Of human kindness into curds and whey
"To find one's self thus absolutely married!—
"This blow, at least, I wish I could have parried.

M

CVI.

"You really ought to feel ashamed-confounded

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"At thus imposing on a simple maiden;

Blighting affection that seemed so well-grounded.

“Oh, think of your poor soul with guilt o'erladen! "I should not wonder if you were struck down dead, "You wicked creature! But too much I've said in "Vain, sir. Pray what's o'clock? Good Lud deliver

us,

"The expression of your face is quite carnivorous!"

CVII.

The wight grew sober instantly; he hurried,

Along the room, three times backwards and forwards;

His jovial leer was gone; but somewhat flurried

Seemed he in temper; neither hiccup nor words Broke from him, for some time; his eyes grew lurid;

Nor did he hear his wife who uttered more words

But curst his stars in English and Etruscan,

As well as any hero of the buskin.