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Dread prince of plackets,* king of codpieces, As I, for praise alone, now seek to spill [ill. Sole imperator, and great general
The poor deer's blood, that my heart means no Of trutting paritors,t-O my little heart!- Boyet. Do not curst wives hold that selfAnd I to be a corporal of his field,
sovereignty And wear his colours like a tumbler's hoop! Only for praise sake, when they strive to be What? I! I love! I sue! I seek a wife! Lords o'er their lords? A woman, that is like a German clock,
Prin. Only for praise : and praise we may, Still a repairing ; ever out of frame;
To any lady that subdues a lord. (afford And never going aright, being a watch, But being watch'd that it may still go right?
Enter CostaRD. Nay, to be perjur'd, which is worst of all; Prin. Here comes a member of the commonAnd, among three, to love the worst of all;
wealth. & whitely wanton with a velvet brow,
Cost. God dig-you-den* all! Pray you,
which With two pitch balls stuck in her face for eyes; is the head lady? Ay, and, by heaven, one that will do the deed, Prin. Thou shalt know her, fellow, by the Though Argus were her eunuch and her guard: rest that have no heads. And I to sigh for her! to watch for her! Cost. Which is the greatest lady, the highest? To pray for her! Go to; it is a plague
Prin. The thickest, and the tallest. That Cupid will impose for my neglect
Cost. The thickest, and the tallest! it is so; Of his almighty dreadful little might.
truth is truth.
(wit, Well, I will love, write, sigh, pray, sue, and An your waist, mistress, were as slender as my groan;
One of these maids' girdies for your waist Some men must love my lady, and some Joan.
should be tit. [Erit. Are not you the chief woman? "you are the
thickest here. ACT IV.
Prin. What's your will, Sir? what's your will? SCENE 1.- Another part of the same. Cost. I have a letter from monsieur Biron, to Enter the PRINCESS, RosaLiNE, MARIA, KA
one lady Rosaline. THARINE, BO YET, Lords, Attendants, and a
Prin. (), thy letter, thy letter; he's a good FORESTER.
friend of mine ;
Stand aside, good bearer.--Boyet, you can Prin. Was that the king, that spurr'd his Break up this capon. horse so hard
Boyet. I am bound to serve.Against the steep uprising of the hill?
This letter is mistook, it importeth none here; Boyet. I know not; but, I think, it was It is writ to Jaquenetta. not he.
Prin. We will read it, I swear : [ear. Prin. Whoe'er he was, he show'd a mount- Break the neck of the wax, and every one give ing mind.
Boyet. [Reads.] By heuren, that thou art jair, Well, lords, to-day we shall have our despatch; is most injallibie; true, that thou art beauteous; On Saturday we will return to France. - truth itsely, that thou art wrely: More fairer than Then, forester, my friend, where is the bush, fair, beautijul than beauteous; truer than truth That we must stand and play the murderer in? | itself, hare commiseration on thy heroical rassal! For. Here by, upon the edge of yonder | The magnanimous and most illusirulet king Cophcoppice;
etua sei eye upon the pernicious and indubitate A stand, where you may make the fairest shoot. I beggar Zenelophon; and he it wus thut might
Prin. I thank my beauty, I am fair that shoot, righily say, veni, vidi, vici; which to anutomize And thereupon thou speak'st, the fairest shoot in the vulgur, ( Obuse and obscure rulgar!, vide
For. Pardon me, madam, for I meant not so. licet, he came, sau, and overcume: he came, one ; Prin. What, what? first praise me, and again sw, tuo; overcumé, three. Who cume? the king;
Why did he come? to see; Why did he see? to Oshort-livá pride! Not fair ? alack for woe! orercome: To whom came he? to the beggar; Whut For. Yes, madam, fair.
saw he? the beggar ; Who orercume he? the begPrin. Nay, dever paint me now; [brow. gar: The conclusion is rictory; On whose side? Where fair is not, praise cannot mend the the king's: the captire is enrich'd; On whose side? Here, good my glass, take this for telling true; the begyar's; The catastrophe is u nuptial; On
[Giving him money. whose side? the king's ?-no, on both in one, or Fair payment for foul words is more than due. one in both. I am the king; for so stands' the For. Nothing but fair is that which you in comparison: thou the beggar; for so witnesseth herit.
thy lowliness. Shall I command thy lore? I may: Prin. See, see, my beauty will be sav'd by Shall I enforce thy lore? I could : Shall I entrout O heresy in fair, fit for these days! (merit. thy love? I will. What shalt thou exchange for A giving hand, though foul, shall have fair rugs? robes; For tittles, titles; For thysely, me. praise.
Thus, expecting thy reply, I profune my lips on But come, the bow :-Now mercy goes to kill, thy foot, my eyes on thy picture, und my heart on And shooting well is then accounted ill. thy every part. Thus will I save my credit in the shoot:
Thine, in the dearest design of industry, Not wounding, pity would not let me do't;
DON ADRIANO DE ARMADO. If wounding, then it was to show my skill, Thus dost thou hear the Nemean lion roar That more for praise, than purpose, meant to 'Gainst thee, thou lamb, that standest as his
kill. And, out of question, so it is sometimes;
Submissive tall his princely feet before, Glory grows guilty of detested crimes; [part, And he from forage will incline to play: When, for fame's sake, for praise, an outward But if thou strive, poor soul, what art thou then? We bend to that the working of the heart: Food for his rage, repasture for his den. Petticoats.
* God give you good even. + Open this letter. + The officers of the spiritual courts who serve citations.
Prin. What plume of feathers is he, that in- Boyet. I fear too much rubbing; Good night,
dited this letter? What vane? what weather-cock? did you ever
my good owl.
[Ereunt Boyet and MARIA. hear better?
Cost. By my soul, a swain ! a most simple Boyet. I am niuch deceived, but I remember
clown! the style.
Lord, lord! how the ladies and I have put Prin. Else your memory is bad, going o'er
him down ! it erewbile.*
O' my troth, most sweet jests! most incony Boyet. This Armado is a Spaniard, that keeps
vulgar wit! here in court;
[sport When it comes so smoothly off, so obscenely, A phantasm, a Monarcho, and one that makes
as it were, so fit. To the prince, and his book-mates.
Armatho o' the one side,-0, a most daiuty Prin. Thou, fellow, a word :
To see him walk before a lady, and to bear her Who gave thee this letter?
fan ! Cost. I told you ; my lord.
To see him kiss his hand! and how most Prin, To whom shouldst thou give it?
sweetly aʼ will swear!
(wit! Cost. From my lord to my lady.
And his page o' t' other side, that handful of Prin. From which lord, to which lady? Ah, heavens, it is a most pathetical hit! Cost. From my lord Biron, a good master of Sola, sola!
[Shouting within. mine,
[Exit Costard, running, To a lady of France, that he call'd Rosaline. Prin. Thou hast mistaken his letter. Come,
SCENE II.-The same. lords, away. Here, sweet, put up this; 'twill be thine anoth- Enter HOLOFERNES, Sir NATHANIEL, and er day. [E.rit Princess and Train.
Nath. Very reverent sport, truly; and done Boyet. Ay, my continent of beauty.
in the testimony of a good conscience. Ros. Why, she that bears the bow.
Hol. The deer was, as you know, in sanFinely put off!
guis,-blood; ripe as a pomewater, * who now Boyet. My lady goes to kill horns ; but, if hangeth like a jewel in the ear of cælo,--the
(carry. sky, the welkin, the heaven; and anon falleth Hang me by the neck, if horns that year mis like a crab, on the face of terra,—the soil, the Finely put on!
land, the earth. Ros. Well then, I am the shooter.
Nath. Truly, master Holofernes, the epi. Boyet. And who is your deer ?
thets are sweetly varied, like a scholar at the Roš. If we choose by the horns, yourself: least: But, Şir, I assure ye, it was a buck of
the first head. Finely put on, indeed !
Hol. Sir Nathaniel, haud credo. Mar. You still wrangle with her, Boyet, and
. "Twas not a haud credo, 'twas a pricket she strikes at the brow,
Hol. Most barbarous intimation ! yet a kind Boyet. But she herself is hit lower: Have I of insinuation, as it were, in via, in way, of hit her now?
explication ; facere, as it were, replication, or Ros. Shall I come upon thee with an old rather, ostentare, to show, as it were, his inclisaying, that was a man when king Pepin of nation, -after his undressed, unpolished, unFrance was a little boy, as touching the hit it? educated, unpruned, untrained, or rather un
Biron. So I may answer thee with one as lettered, or, ratherest, unconfirmed fashion,old, that was a woman when queen Guinever to insert again my haud credo for a deer. of Britain was a little wench, as touching the
Dull. I said, the deer was not a haud credo ; hit it.
'twas a pricket. Ros. Thou canst not hit it, hit it, hit it, (Singing. o thou monster ignorance, how deformed dost
Hol. Twice sod, simplicity, bis coctus ! Thou canst not hit it, my good man. Boyet. An I cannot, cannot, cannot,
thou look! An I cannot, another cun.
Nath. Sir, he hath never fed of the dainties (Ereunt Ros, and Kath. that are bred in a book ; he hath nut eat paper, Cost. By my troth, most pleasant! how both as it were ; he hath not drunk ink: his inteldid fit it!
lect is not replenished; he is only an animal, Mar. A mark marvellous well shot; for they only sensible in the duller parts; both did hit it.
And such barren plants are set before us, that Boyet. A mark! 0, mark but that mark;
we thankful should be A mark, says my lady!
(Which we of taste and feeling are) for those Let the mark have a prick in't, to mete at, if
parts that do fructify in us more than he. it may be.
For as it would ill become me to be vain, inMar. Wideo' the bow hand! I'faith your
discreet, or a fool, hand is out.
So, were there a patcht set on learning, to see Cost. Indeed, a' must shoot nearer, or he'll
him in a school : ne'er hit the clout.
But, omne bene, say I ; being of an old father's Boyet. An if my hand be out, then, belike Many can brook the weather, that love not the your hand is in.
wind. Cost. Then will she get the upshot by cleav- Dull. You two are book-men : Can you tell ing the pin.
by your wit, Mar. Come, come, you talk greasily, your What was a month old at Cain's birth, that's lips grow foul.
not five weeks old as yet? Cost. She's too hard for you at pricks, Sir; Hol. Dictynda, good man Dull; Dictynoa, challenge her to bowl.
good man Dull.
* A species of apple.
† A low fellow.
Dull. What is Dictynna?
Ruminat,--and so forth. Ah, good old Man.
- Vinegin, Vinegia,
Chi non te rede, ei non te pregia. to fivescore.
Old Mantuan! old Mantuan! who underThe allusion holds in the exchange.
standeth thee not, loves thee not.-Ot, re, sol, Dull. 'Tis true indeed ; the collusion holds lu, mi, fu.-Under pardon, Sir, what are the in the exchange.
contents ? or, rather, as Hurace says in hisHol. God comfort thy capacity! I say, the What, my soul, verses ? allusion holds in the exchange.
Nath. Ay, Sir, and very learned. Dull. And I say the pollution holds in the Hol. Let me hear a staif, a stanza, a verse ; exchange; for the moon is never but a month Lege, domine. old : and I say beside, that 'twas a pricket Nath. If love make me forsworn, how shall that the princess kill'd.
I swear to love? Hol. Sir Nathaniel, will you hear an extem- Ah, never faith could hold, if not to beauty poral epitaph on the death of the deer? and,
vowed ! to humour the ignorant, I have callid the deer Though to myself forsworn, to thee I'll faiththe princess killa, a pricket.
ful prove; Nath. Perge, good" master Holofernes, per- Those thoughts to me were oaks, to thee like ge; so it shall please you to abrogate scurrility.
osiers bowed. Hol. I will something atfect the letter ; for Study his bias leaves, and makes his book it argues facility.
thine eyes ; The praistful princess pierc'd and prick'd a pretty Where all those pleasures live, that art pleasing pricket ;
would comprehend: Some say, a sure ; but not a sore, till now made If knowledge be the mark, to know thee sore with shooting.
shall suffice; The dogs did yell ; put I to sore, then sorel jumps Well learned is that tongue, that well can from thicket ;
thee commend : Or pricket, sore, or else sorel; the people fall a All ignorant that soul, that sees thee withhooting.
out wonder ; If sore be sore, then L to sore makes fifty sores ; (Which is to me some praise, that I thy O sore L!
parts admire ;) Of one sore I an hundred make, by adding but Thy eye Jove's lightning bears, thy voice his one more L.
dreadful thunder, Nath. A rare talent!
Wbich, not to anger bent, is music, and Dull. If a talent be a claw, look how he
[wrong, claws him with a talent.
Celestial, as thou art, oh pardon, love, this Hol. This is a gift that I have, simple, sim- That sings heaven's praise with such an ple; a fuolish extravagant spirit, full of forms,
earthly tongue ! bgures, shapes, objecis, ideas, apprehensions, Hol. You tind not the apostrophes, and so motions, revolutions : these are begot in the miss the accent: let me supervise the canzonet. ventricle of memory, nourished in the womb Here are only numbers ratified ; but, for the of piu mater; and deliver'd upon the mellow elegancy, facility, and golden cadence of poesy, ing of occasion : But the gift is good in those caret. Ovidius Naso was the man; and why, in whom it is acute, and I am thankful for it. indeed, Naso; but for smelling out the odori.
Nath. Sir, I praise the Lord for you; and lerous flowers of fancy, the jerks of invention? so may my parishioners; for their sons are Imitari, is nothing : so doth the hound his well tutor'd by you, and their daughters profit master, the ape bis keeper, the tired horse* his very greatly under you : you are a good nem-rider. But damosella virgin, was this directed ber of the commonwealth.
to you? Hol. Mehercle, if their sons be ingenious, Jaq. Ay, Sir, from one Monsieur Biron, one they shall want no instruction : if their daugh- of the strange queen's lords. ters be capable, I will put it to them : But, rir Hol. I will overglance the superscript. To sapit, qui paucú loquitür: a soul feminine sa- the snow-white hund of the most beuuteous Lady luieth us.
Rosaline. I will look again on the intellect of
the letter, for the nomination of the party Enter JAQUENETTA and COSTARD. writing to the person written unto: Jaq. God give you good morrow, master per- Your Ladyship's in all desired employment,
Biron. Sir Nathaniel, this Biron is one of Hol. Master person,--quasi pers-on. And the votaries with the king; and here he bath if one should be pierced, which is the one ? framed a letter to a sequent of the stranger
Cost. Marry, master schoolmaster, he that queen's, whicl., accidently, or by the way of is likest to a hogshead.
progression, hath miscarried.---'Irip and go, Hol. Of piercing a hogshead! a good lustre my sweet; deliver this paper into the royal of conceit in a turf of earth; fire enough for band of the king; it may concern much : Siay a flint, pearl enough for a swine: 'tis pretty ; not thy compliment; I forgive thy duty; adieu. it is well.
Jaq: Good Costard go with me.-Sir, God Jaq: Good master parson, be so good as read save your life! me this letter; it was given me by Costard,
Cost. Have with thee, my girl. and sent me from Don Armatho:1 beseech
(Ereunt Cost. and JaQ. you, read it.
Nath. Sir, you have done this in the fear of Hol. Fauste, precor gelida quundo pecus omne God, very religiously; and, as a certain father sub umbra
Hol. Sir, tell not me of the father, I do fear colourable colours. But, to return to the ver
Enter LONGAVILLE, with a paper. ses; Did they please you, Sir Nathaniel ? What, Longaville! and reading ! listen, ear. Nath. Marvellous well for the pen.
Biron. Now, in thy likeness, one more fool, Hol. I do dine to-day at the father's of a
[Aside. certain pupil of mine ; where it, before repist,
Long. Al me! I am fursworn. it shall please you to gratify the table with a Biron. Why, he comes in like a perjure, grace, I will, on my privilege I have with the
[ Aside. parents of the foresaid child or pupil, under- King. In love, i hope ; Sweet fellowship in take your ben venuto; where I wil prove those
(Aside. verses to be very unlearned, neither savouring Biron. One drunkard loves another of the of poetry, wit, nor invention : I beseech your
[ Asiite. society.
Long. Am I the first that have been perjur'd Nath. And thank you too : for society, (saith the text,) is the happiness of lite.
Biron. [ Aside] I could put thee in comfort; Hol. And, certes, the text most infallibly
not by two, that i know: concludes it.-Sir, (To Dull.] I do invite you Thou mak'st the triumviry, the corner-cap of too; you shall not say me, nay: pauca verba.
[plicity. Away; the gentles are at their game, and we The shape of love's Tyburn that hangs up sim. will to our recreation.
[Ereunt. Long. I fear, these stubborn lines lack power
to move : SCENE III.-Another part of the same. O sweet Maria, empress of my love! Enter Biron with a paper.
These numbers will I tear, and write in prose.
Biron. (Aside.) 0, rhymes are guards on Biron. The king he is hunting the deer; I
wanton Cupid's hose : am coursing myself: they have pitch'd a toil; Disfigure not his slop. I am toiling in a pitch; pitch that defiles ; de- Long. This same shall go.file ! a foul word. Well, Set thee down, sor
(He rends the sonnet. row! for so, they say, the fool said, and so say Did not the heurenly rhetoric of thine eye I, and I the fool. Well proved, wit! By the
('Gainst whom the world cannot hold argument,) lord, this love is as mad as Ajax : it kills Persuade my heart to this false perjury? sheep; it kills me, I a sheep: Well proved Vow's, for thee broke, deserce not punishment. again on my side! I will not love: if I do, A woman I forsuore; but, I will prore, hang me; i'faith, I will not. O, but her eye, Thou being u goddess, I forsuore not thee : -by this' light, but for her eye,' I would not My row uus earthly, thou a hearenly love ; love her; yes, for her two eyes. Well, I do Thy grace being guin'd, cures all disgrace in me. nothing in the world but lie, and lie in my Vous are but breath, and breath a vupour is : throat. By heaven, I do love : and it hath Then thou, fair sún, which on any earth dost taught me to rhyme, and to be melancholy;
shine, and here is part of my rhyme, and here my Exhal'st this tapour row : in thee it is: melancholy." Well, she hath one o' my son- If broken then, it is no fault of mine ; nets already; the clown bore it, the fool sent f by me broke, 'What fool is not so uise, it, and the lady
hath it : sweet clown, sweeter To lose an oath to win a paradise ? fool, sweetest lady! By the world, I would Biron. (Aside.) This is the liver vein, which not care a pin if the other three were in: Here
makes ficsh a deity; comes one with a paper; God give him grace A green goose, a goddess : pure, pure idolatry. to groan ! (Gets up into a tree. God amend us, God amend! we are much out
o' the way. Enter the King, with a paper.
Enter DUMAIN, with a paper. King. Ah me!
Long. By whom shall I send this ?-Com. Biron. [Aside.) Shot, by heaven !--Proceed,
pany! stay. [ Stepping aside. sweet Cupid ; thou hast thump'd him with thy Biron. (Aside.) All hid, all bid, an old inbird-bolt under the left pap :-I'faith secrets.
fant play: King. [Reads.) So sweet a kiss the golden sun Like a demi-god' here sit I in the sky, gives not
And wretched fools' secrets heedfully o'er-eye. To those fresh morning drops upon the rose,
More sacks to the mill! O heavens, I have iny Asthy eye-beams, when their fresh rays hare smote
[dish! The night of dew that on my cheeks down flows: Dumain transform’d: four woodcocks in a Nor shines the silver moon one half so bright Dum. () most divine Kate!
Through the transparent bosom of the deep, Biron. O most profane coxcomb! (Aside. As doth thy face through tears of mine gire light; Dum. By heaven, the wonder of a mortal Thou shin'st in erery tear that I do weep:
eye! No drop but us u coach doth carry theo,
Biron. By earth, she is but corporal; there So ridest thou triumphing in my woe;
[Aside. Do but behold the tears that swell in me,
Dum. Her amber hairs for foul have amber And they thy glory through thy grief will show :
coted. But do not love thyself; then thou wilt keep Biron. An amber-colour'd raven was well My teurs for glusses, and still make me weep.
[Aside. o queen of queens, icou far dost thou ercel! Dum. As upright as the cedar. No thought can think, nor tongue of mortal tell.- Biron. Stoop, 1 say; How shall she know my griefs ? I'll drop the Her shoulder is with child.
Dum. As fair as day. Sweet leaves, 'shade folly. Who is he comes Biron Ay, as some days; but then no son here i
• Outstripped, surpassed.
Long. And I had mine!
[Aside. These worms for loving, that art most in love? King. And I mine too, good Lord! (Aside. Your eyes do make no coaches ; in your tears, Biron. Amen, so I had mine : Is not that a There is no certain princess that appears : good word ?
[Aside. You'll not be perjur'd, 'tis a hateful thing; Dum. I would forget her; but a fever she Tush, none but minstrels like of sunneting. Reigns in my blood,
and will remember'd be. But are you not asham'd ? nay, are you not, Biron. A fever in your blood, why, then in All three of you, to Le thus much o'ershot ? cision
You found his mote; the king your mute did Would let her out in saucers; Sweet mispris- But I a beam do tind in each of three.
[Aside. O, what a scene of foolery I have seen, Dum. Once more I'll read the ode that I Of sighs, of groans, of sorrow, and of teen !* have writ.
( me, with what strict patience have I sat, Biron. Once more I'll mark how love can To see a king transformed to a gnat! vary wit.
(Aside. To see great Hercules whipping a gigg, Dum. On a day, ( alack the day!)
And profound Solomon to tune a jigg,
And critict Timon laugh at idle toys!
Where lies thy grief, o tell me, good Dumain ?
And where my liege's?'all about the breast:
A caudle, ho !
Biron. Not you by me, but I betray'd to you,
I, that am honest; 1, that hold it sin
I am betray'd, by keeping company
With moon-like men, of strange inconstancy.
When shall you see me write a thing in rhyme ? That I am forsworn for thee:
Or groan for Joan ? or spend a minute's time Thou for uhom even Jove would suear, In pruningt me? When shall you hear that I Juno but an Ethiop were ;
Will praise a hand, a foot, a face, an eye, And deny himself for Jove,
A gait, a state, a brow, a breast, a waist, Turning mortal for thy love.
A leg, a limb?This will I send ; and something else more King. Soft; Whither away so fast ? plain,
A true man, or a thief, that gallops so ? That shall express my true love's fasting pain. Biron. I post from love; good lover, let me 0, would the King, Biron, and Longaville,
go. Were lovers too ! Ill, to example ill,
Enter JAQUENETTA and COSTARD.
Cost. Some certain treason.
King. What makes treason here? You may look pale, but I should blush I know, Cost. Nay, it makes nothing, Sir. To be o'erbeard, and taken napping so.
King. If it mar nothing neither, [geth King. Come, Sir, [Advancing.] you blush; The treason, and you, go in peace away toas his your case is such ;
Jug. 1 beseech your grace, let this letter be You chide at him, oftending twice as much :
read; You do not love Maria ; Longaville
Our parson misdoubts it; 'twas reason, he said. Did never sonnet for her sake compile ;
King. Biron, read it over. Nor never lay his wreathed arms athwart
[Giving him the letter. His loving bosom, to keep down his heart.
Where hadst thou it?
Cost. Of Dun Adramadio, Dun Adramadio. I heard your guilty rhymes, observ'd your King. How now! what is in you? why dost Saw sighs reek from you, noted well your
thou tear it? passion:
Biron. A toy, my liege, a toy ; your grace Ah me! says one ; 0 Jove! the other cries;
needs not fear it. One, her hairs were gold, crystal the other's Long. It did move him to passion, and thereeyes:
fore let's hear it. You would for paradise break faith and truth; Dum. It is Biron's writing, and here is his (To Long.
[Picks up the pieces. And Jove, for your love, would infringe an Biron. Ah, you whoreson loggerhead, [To oath.
CostaRD.) you were born to do me What will Birón say, when that he shall hear
shame. A faith infring'd, which such a zeal did swear? Guilty, my lord, guilty; I confess, I consess. How will he scorn ? how will he spend his wit? King. What?' How will be triumph, leap, and laugh at it? Biron. That you three fools lack'd me fool to For all the wealth that ever I did see,
make up the mess : I would not have him know so much by me. He, he, and you, my liege, and I,
Biron. Now step I forth to whip hypocrisy.- Are pick-purses in love, and we deserve to die. Ab, good my liege, I pray thee pardon me : 0, dismiss this audience, and I shall tell you
[Descends from the tree. Good heart, what grace hast thou, thus to re
Dum. Now the number is even. prove
# Grief. + Cynic. * In trimming mysell.