Darius Green and His Flying-Machine 2099 I'll fly a few times around the lot, To see how 't seems, then soon's I've got Over their heads I'll sail like an eagle; I'll balance myself on my wings like a sea-gull; An I'll say to the gawpin' fools below, 'What world's this 'ere that I've come near?' Fer I'll make 'em b'lieve I'm a chap f'm the moon; He crept from his bed; And, seeing the others were gone, he said, To open the wonderful box in the shed. His brothers had walked but a little way, "Don'o',-the' 's suthin' er other to pay, Ef he hedn't got some machine to try." An' pay him fer tellin' us that yarn!" And there they hid; and Reuben slid "While I squint an' see what the' is to see." As knights of old put on their mail,— (I believe they called the thing a helm,)— The dragons and pagans that plagued the realm; But more like the helm of a ship. "Hush!" Reuben said, "he's up in the shed! An' nobody near;— Guess he don'o' who's hid in here! Of his spring-board, and teeters to try its strength. Darius Green and His Flying-Machine 2101 Fer to see 'f the' 's any one passin' by; As a demon is hurled by an angel's spear, In the midst of the barn-yard, he came down, Broken tail and broken wings, Shooting-stars, and various things,— And what was that? Did the gosling laugh? Slowly, ruefully, where he lay, Darius just turned and looked that way, As he stanched his sorrowful nose with his cuff, "Wal, I like flyin' well enough," He said; "but the' ain't sich a thunderin' sight I just have room for the MORAL here: John Townsend Trowbridge [1827 THE SOCIETY UPON THE STANISLAUS I RESIDE at Table Mountain, and my name is Truthful James; I am not up to small deceit, or any sinful games; And I'll tell in simple language what I know about the row That broke up our Society upon the Stanislow. But first I would remark, that it is not a proper plan Now nothing could be finer or more beautiful to see Then Brown he read a paper, and he reconstructed there, From those same bones, an animal that was extremely rare; And Jones then asked the Chair for a suspension of the rules, Till he could prove that those same bones was one of his lost mules. Then Brown he smiled a bitter smile, and said he was at fault, It seemed he had been trespassing on Jones's family vault: Now I hold it is not decent for a scientific gent Then Abner Dean of Angel's raised a point of order—when A chunk of old red sandstone took him in the abdomen, And he smiled a kind of sickly smile, and curled up on the floor, And the subsequent proceedings interested him no more. Dow's Flat 2103 For, in less time than I write it, every member did engage Till the skull of an old mammoth caved the head of Thompson in. And this is all I have to say of these improper games, For I live at Table Mountain, and my name is Truthful James; And I've told in simple language what I know about the row That broke up our Society upon the Stanislow. DOW'S FLAT 1856 Bret Harte [1839-1902] Dow's FLAT. That's its name; And I reckon that you Are a stranger? The same? Well, I thought it was true,— For thar isn't a man on the river as can't spot the place at first view. It was called after Dow, Which the same was an ass; And as to the how Thet the thing kem to pass, Jest tie up your hoss to that buckeye, and sit ye down here in the grass. You see this 'yer Dow Hed the worst kind of luck; He slipped up somehow On each thing thet he struck. Why, ef he'd a-straddled thet fence-rail, the derned thing 'ed get up and buck. |