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Fal. Truly, mine host, I must turn away some Pist. Shall I Sir Pandarus of Troy become, of my followers.
And by my side wear steel? then, Lucifer take Host. Discard, bully Ilercules ; cashier; let all! thein wag; trot, trot.
Nym. I will run no base humour; here take Ful. I sit at ten pounds a week.
the humour letter; I will keep the 'haviour of Host. Thou'rt an emperor, Cæsar, Keiser, and reputation. Pheezar, I will entertain Bardolph; he shall Ful. Hold, sirrah (to Rop.) bear you these drax, he shall tap: said I well, bully Hector? letters tightly; Fal. Do so, good mine host.
Sail like my pinnace to these golden shores.Host. I have spoke; let him follow: Let me Rogues, hence, avaunt! vanish like hailstones, see thee froth, and lime: I am at a word, follow. go;
(pack! [Erit Host. Trudge, plod away, o' the hoof; seek shelter, Fal. Bardolph, follow him; a tapster is a good Falstaff will learn the humour of this age, trade: an old cloak makes a new jerkin; a wi- French thrift, you rogues; myself, and skirted thered servingman, a fresh tap.ster: Go; adien. page. [E.crunt FALSTAFF and Robix.
Bard. It is a life that I have desired; I will Pist. Let vultures gripe thy guts! for gourd thrive.
and fullaun holds, Pist. O base Gongarian wight! wilt thou the And high and low beguile the rich and poor: spigot wield?
Tester I'll have in pouch, when thou shalt lack, Nym. He was gotten in drink: Is not the hu- Base Phrygian Turk! mour conceited ? Ilis mind is not heroick, and Nym. I have operations in my head, which here's the humour of it.
be humours of revenge. Fal. I am glad I am so acquit of this tinder- Pist. Wilt thou revenge ? box; his thesis were too open: his blehing was Nym. By welkin and her star! like an unskilful singer, he kept 1100 time. Pist. With wit, or steel?
Nym. The good humour is, to steal at a mi- Nym. With both the humours, I: nute's rest.
I will discuss the humour of this love to Page, Pist. Convey, the wise it call: Steal! foh; a Pist. And I to Ford shall eke unfold, fico for the phrase!
How Falstaff, varlet vile, Fal. Well, sirs, I am almost out at heels.
His dove will prove, his gold will hold, Pist. Why then let kibos ensue.
And his soft couch defile. Fal. There is no remedy; I must coney-catch; Nym. My humour shall not cool: I will inI must shift.
cense Page to deal with poison ; I will possess Pist. Young ravens must have food. him with yellowness, for the revolt of mien is Fal. Which of you know Ford of this town? | dangerous : that is my true humour. Pisi. I ken the wight; he is of substance good. Pist. Thou art the Mars of malcontents: I Hal. My honest lads, I will tell you what I second thee; troop on.
[Exeunt. l'ist. Two yards and more.
SCENE IV. A Room in Dr. Caius's House. Fal. No quips now, Pistol; indeed I am in the waist two yards about; but I am now about no
Enter Mrs. QUICKLY, SIMPLE, and Rugpy. Waste; I am about thrift. Briefly, I do mean to Quick. What; John Rugby "I pray thee, go make love to Ford's wife; spy entertainment to the casement, and see if you can see my in her; she discourses, she carves, she gives the master, master Doctor Caius, coming; if he do, leer of invitation : I can construie the action of i' faith, and find any body in the house, here her faniliar style, and the hardest voice of her will be an old abusing of God's patience, and behaviour, to be English'd rightly, is, I am Sir the king's English. John Falstaff's.
Hug. I'll go watch.
[Exit RUGBY. Hist. He hath studied her well, and trans- Quick. Go; and we'll have a posset for't soon lated her well; out of honesty into English. at night, in faith, at the latter end of a sea-coal
Vym. The anchor is deep: will that humour tire. An honest, willing, kind fellow, as ever pass?
servant shall come in house withal; and, I warFal. Now, the report goes, she has all the rule rant you, no tell-tale, nor no breed-bate; his of her husband's purse; she hath legions of worst fault is, that he is given to prayer; he is angels.
[boy, say 1. something peevish that way : but nobody but Pist. As many devils entertain; and, To her, has his fault;--but let that pass. Peter Simple,
Nym. The humour rises; it is good; humour you say, your name is? me the angels.
Sim. Ay, for fault of a better. Fal. I have writ me here a letter to her; and Quick. And master Slender's your master? here another to Page's wife; who even now gave Sim. Ay, forsooth. me good eyes too, examined my parts with most Quick. Does he not wear a great round beard, judicious éyliads : sometimes the beam of her like a glover's paring knife? view gilded my foot, sometimes my portly belly. Sim. No, forsooth: he hath but a little wee face,
Pist. Then did the sun on dungbill shine. with a little yellow beard; a Cain-coloured beard. Vym. I thank thee for that humour.
Quick. A softly-sprighted man, is he not? Fal. O, she did so course o'er my exteriors with Šim. Ay, forsooth: but he is as tall a man of such a greedy intention, that the appetite of her his hands, as any is between this and his head; eye did seem to scorch me up like a burning he hath fought with a warrener. glass! Here's another letter to her: she bears Quick. How say you ?-0, I should remember the purse too: she is a region in Guiana, all gold him; Does he not hold up his head, as it were ? and bounty. I will be cheater to them both, and and strut in his gait? they shall be exchequers to me; they shall be Sim. Yes, indeed, does he. my East and West Indies, and I will trade to Quick. Well, heaven send Anne Page noworse them both. Go, bear thou this letter to mis- fortune! Tell master parson Evans, I will do trens Page; and thou this to mistress Ford : we what I can for your master: Anne is a good girl, will thrive, lads, we will thrive.
and I wish
himself is in love with mistress Anne Page; but Rug. Ont, alas! here comes my master. notwithstanding that, -I know Anne's mind,
Quick. We shall all be shent: Run in here, that's neither here nor there. good young man; go into this closet. (Shuts Caius. You jack’nape ; give-a dis letter to Sir Bimple in the closet.] He will not stay long.- Hugh; by gar, it is a shallenge: I vill cut his What, John Rugby! John, what, John, I say : troat in de park; and I vill teach a scurvy jack--Go, John, go inquire for my master; I doubt, a-nape priest to meddle or make :--you may be he be not well, that he comes not home :-and gone; it is not good you tarry here :--by gar, I down, down, a-dowon-a, de.
[Sings. vill cut all his two stones; by gar, he shall not
have a stone to trow at his dog. Enter Doctor Cains.
Quick. Alas, he speaks but for his friend. Caius. Vat is you sing? I do not like dese Caius. It is no matter-a for dat:do not you toys: Pray you, yo and vetch me in my closet tell-a me dat I shall have Anne Page for myself? un boitier verd; a box, a green-a box; Do intend-by gar, I vill kill de Jack priest; and I haveapvat I speak ? a green-a box.
pointed mine host of de Jarterre to measure our Quick. Ay, forsooth, I'll fetch it you.
weapon :-by gar, I vill myself have Anne Page. Elad he went not in himself; if he had found
Quick. Sir, the maid loves you, and all shall the young man, he would have been horn-mad. be well: we must give folks leave to prate :
(.Aside.. What, the good-jer! Caius. Fe, fe, fe, fe! ma foi, il fait fort chaud.
Caius. Rnghy, come to the court vit me;-By Je m'en vais a la Cour,-la grand affaire.
gar, if I have not Anne Page, I shall turn your Quick. Is it this, sir?
head out of iny door: - Follow my heels, Rugby. Caius. Ouy; mette leau mon pocket; Depeche,
(Ereunt Caius and Rugby. quickly :-Vere is dat knave Rugby?
Quick. You shall have An fools-head of your Quick. What, John Rugby! John!
own. No, I know Anne's mind for that; never Rug. Here, sir.
a woman in Windsor knows more of Anne's Caius. You are John Rugby, and you are Jack mind than I do; nor can do more than I do Rugby ; Come, take-a your rapier, and come with her, I thank heaven. after my heel to de court.
Fent. (Within. Who's within there, ho? Rug. 'Tis ready, sir, here in the porch. Caius. By my trot, 1 tarry too long :- Od's house, I pray yon.
Quick. Who's there, I trow? Come near the me! Qu'ay-j'oublier dere is some simples in my
Enter FENTON. closet, dat I will not for the varld I shall leave
Fent. How now, good woman: how dost thou ? behind.
Quick. The better, that it pleases your good Quick. Ah me! he'll find the young man there worship to ask.
(Anne? and be mad.
Font. What news ? how does pretty mistress Onius. O diable, diable ! vat is in my closet?
Quick. In truth, sir, and she is pretty, and hoVillainy, larron!' (Pulling Simple out.] Rugby! nest, and gentle; and one that is your friend, I my rapier,
can tell you that by the way: I praise heaven Quick. Good master, be content.
for it. Caius. Verefore shall I be content-a?
Fent. Shall I do any good, thinkest thou ? Quick. The young man is an honest man.
Shall I not lose my suit? Caius. Vat shall de honest man do in my clo
Quick. Troth, sir, all is in his hands above: set? dere is no honest man dat shall come in but notwithstanding, master Fenton, I'll be my closet.
sworn on a book, she loves you :-Have not Quick. I beseech you, be not so flegmatick; your worship a wart above your eye? hear the truth of it: He came of an errand to
Fent. Yes, marry, have I; what of that? me from parson Hugh.
Quick. Well, thereby hangs a tale;--good faith, Cairs. Vell.
it is such another Nan:- but, I detest, an honest Sin. Ay, forsooth, to desire her to-
maid as ever broke bread :-We had an hour's Quick. Peace, I pray you.
(tale talk of that wart ;-) shall never laugh but in Caius. Peace-a your tongue :-Speak-a your that maid's company! But, indeed, she is given
Sim. To desire this honest gentlewoman, your too much to allicholly and musing: But for you maid, to speak a good word to mistress Anne -well, go to. Page for my master, in the way of marriage.
Fent. Well, I shall see her to-day: Hold, Quick. This is all, indeed, ia; but I'll ne'er there's money for thee ; let me have thy voice put my finger in the fire, and need not.
in my bchalf: if thou seest her before me, comCaius. Sir Hugh send-a you !--Rugby, baille: mend meme some paper :- Tarry you a little-a while.
Quick. Will I? i'faith, that we will:and I will
[Writes. tell your worship more of the wart, the next Quick. I am glad he is so quiet: if he had been time we have confidence: and of other wooers. thoroughly moved, you should have heard hiin
Fent. Well, farewell; I am in great haste now, so loud and so melancholy ;-But notwithstand
[Exito ing, man, I'll do your master what good I can:
Quick. Farewell to your worship.--Truly, an and the very yea and the no is, the French honest gentleman; but Anne loves him not; for Doctor, my master,--I may call him my master, I know Anne's mind as well as another does : look you, for I keep his house; and I wash, Out upon't! what have I forgot? (Exito wring, brew, bake, scour, dress meat and drink, make the beds, and do all myself:
Sim. "Tis a great charge, to come under one body's hand.
Art Berond. Quick. Are you advis'd o' that? you shall find it a great charge: and to be up early, and down
SCENE I. Before Page's House. late ;-but notwithstanding (to tell you in your
Enter Mistress Page, with a letter. tar; I would have no words of it;) my master Yrs. Page. What! have I'scaped love-letters in the holy-day time of my beauty, and am 1 bath a thousand of these letters, writ with blank now a subject for them? Let me see? [Reads. space for different names, (sure more), and these
Ask me no reason why I love you; for though love are of the second edition: He will print them We reason for his precision, he admits him not for out of doubt: for he cares not what he puts into his counsellor ; you are not young, no more am 1; the press, when he would put us two. I had go to then, there's sympathy: you are merry, so am rather be a giantess, and lie under mount Pelion. 1; Ha! ha! then there's more sympathy : you love Well, I will find you twenty lascivious turtles, sack, and so do I; would you desire better sympathyere one chaste
man. Let it sufice thee, mistress Page (at the leasi, if the Mrs. Ford. Why, this is the very same; the love of a soldier can sufice), that I love thee. I will very hand, the very words: what doth he think not say, pity me, 'tis not a soidier-like phrase; but 1 of us? kay, love me. By me,
Mrs. Page. Nay, I know not: It makes mo Thine own true knight,
almost ready to wrangle with mine own honesty. By day or night,
I'll entertain myself like one that I am not acor any kind of light,
quainted withal; for, sure, unless he know some With all his might
strain in me, that I know not myself, he would For thee to fight,
never have boarded me in this fury.
John Falstaff. Mrs. Ford. Boarding call you it? I'll be suro What a Herod of Jewry is this !-0 wicked, to keep him above deck. wicked world !-one that is well nigh worn to Mrs. Page. So will I; if he come under my pieces with age, to show himself a young gal- hatches, I'll never to sea again. Let's be relant! What an unweighed behaviour hath this venged on him; let's appoint him a meeting; Flemish drunkard picked(with the devil's name) give him a show of comfort in his suit; and lead out of my conversation, that he dares in this on with a fine-baited delay, till he hath pawn'd mannerassay me? Why, he hath not been thrice his horses to mine Host of the Garter. in my company !-What should I say to him? Mrs. Ford. Nay, I will consent to act any ---I was then frugal of my mirth :-heaven for- villany against him, that may not sully the give me !-Why, I'll exhibit a bill in the par- chariness of our honesty. O, that my husband liament for the putting down of fat men. How saw this letter! it would give eternal food to shall I be revenged on him? for revenged I will his jealousy. be, as sure as his guts are made of puddings. i Mrs. Page. Why, look, where he comes; and Enter Mistress FORD.
my good man too: he's as far froni jealousy, as Mrs. Ford. Mistress Page! trust me, I was I am from giving him cause; and that, I hope, going to your house.
is an unmeasureable distance. Mrs. Page. And trust me, I was coming to
Mrs Ford. You are the happier woman. you. You look very ill.
Mrs. Page. Let's consult together against this Mrs. Ford. Nay, i'll ne'er believe that; I have greasy knight: Come hither. (They retire. to show to the contrary.
Enter Ford, Pistol, PAGE, and Nym. Mrs. Page. 'Faith, but you do, in my mind. Ford. Well, I hope it be not so.
Mrs. Ford. Well, I do then; yet, I say, I could Pist. Hope is a curtail dog in some affairs : show you to the contrary : 0, mistress Page, Sir John affects thy wife. give me some counsel !
Ford. Why, sir, my wife is not young. Mrs. Page. What's the matter, woman? Pist. He woos both high and low, both rich
Mrs. Ford. O woman, if it were not for one trifling respect, I could come to such honour! Both young and old, one with another, Ford:
Mrs. Page. Ilang the trifie, woman; take the He loves the gally-mawfry; Ford, perpend. honour; What is it?-dispense with trifles;- Ford. Love my wife ?
[thou, what is it?
Pist. With liver burning hot: Prevent, or go Yrs. Ford. If I would but go to hell for an Like Sir Actæon he, with Ring-wood at thy heels: eternal moment, or so, I could be knighted. 0, odious is the name!
Mrs. Page. What?-thou liest|--Sir Alice Ford. What name, sir? Ford !These knights will hack; and so thou Pist. The horn, I say: Farewell. should'st not alter the article of thy gentry. Take heed; have open eye; for thieves do foot Mrs. Ford. We burn day-light; here, read, by night:
[do sing. read-perceive how I might be knighted.-i Take heed, ere summer comes, or cuckoo birds shall think the worse of fat men, as long as I Away, Sir corporal Nymhave an eye to make difference of men's liking: Believe it, Page; he speaks sense. (Erit Pist. And yet he would not swear; praised women's Ford. I will be patient; I will find out this. modesty : and gave such orderly and well-be- Nym. And this is true. [To PAGE.] I like not haved reproof to all uncomeliness, that I would the humour of lying. He hath wronged me in have sworn his disposition would have gone to some humours; I should have borne the huthe truth of his words: but they do no more moured letter to her; but I have a sword, and adhere and keep place together, than the hun- it shall bite upon my necessity. He loves your dredth psalm to the tune of Green-sleeves. What wife; there's the short and the long. My name tempest, I trow, threw this whale, with so many is corporal Nym; I speak, and I avonch. 'Tis tuns of oil in his belly, ashore at Windsor? How true my name is Nym, and Falstaffloves your shall I be revenged on him? I think, the best wife.-Adieu! I love not the humour of bread way were to entertain him with hope, till the and cheese; and there's the humour of it. Adieu. wicked fire of lust have melted him in his own
(Erit Nym. grease.- Did you ever hear the like?
Page. The humour of il, quoth'a! here's a felMrs. Page. Letter for letter; but that the name low frights humour out of his wits. of Page and Ford differs !--To thy great comfort Ford. I will seek out Falstaff. in this mystery of ill opinions, here's the twin- Page. I never heard such a drawling, affectbrother of thy letter; but let thine inherit first; ing rogue. for, 1 protest, mine never shall. I warrant hel Ford. If I do find it, well.
Page. I will not believe such a Cataian, Host. Hast thou no suit against my knight though the priest of the town commended him my guest-cavalier? for a true man.
Ford. None, I protest: but I'll give you a Ford. "Twas a good sensible fellow : Well. pottle of burnt sack to give me recourse to him, Page. How now, Meg?
and tell him, my name is Brook; only for a jest. Mrs. Page. Whither go you, George ?-Hark Host. My hand, bully: thou shalt have egress yoll.
(thou melancholy? and regress; said I well? and thy name shall Jlrs. Ford. How now, sweet Frank? why art he Brook. It is a merry knight.-Will you go,
Ford. I melancholy! I am not melancholy.- Cavaliers? Get you home, go.
Shal. Have with you, mine host. Mrs. Ford. 'Faith, thou hast some crotchets in Paje. I have heard, the Frenchman hath good thy head now.-Will you go, mistress Page ? skill in his rapier.
Curs. Page. Have with you.-You'll come to Shal. Tut, sir, I could have told you more: dinner, George?-Look, who comes yonder; she In these times you stand on distance, your passes, shall be our messenger to this paltry knight. stoccadoes, and I know not what:'tis the heart,
(Asile to Mrs. Ford. master Page: 'tis here, 'tis here. I have seen Enter MISTRESS QUICKLY.
the time, with my long sword, I would have BIrs. Ford. Trust me, I thought on her: she'll made you four tail fellows skip like rats. fit it.
Hosi. Here, boys, here, here! shall we wag? Jrs, Page. You are come to see my daughter
Pnge. Have with you :-I had rather hear quick. Ay, forsooth; And, I pray, how does them scold than fight. good mistress Anne ?
(Exeunt Host, SHAL. and Page. Vrs. Page. Go in with us, and see; we have
Ford. Though Page be a secure fool, and an hour's talk with yon.
stands so firmly on his wife's frailty, yet I can[Exeunt Mrs. PAGE, Mrs. Ford and not put off my opinion so easily: She was in his Mrs. QUICKLY.
company at Page's house; and, what they made
there, I know not. Well, I will look further Prige. How now, master Ford ? Ford. You heard what this knave told me; In I find her honest, I lose not my labour; if
into't: and I have a disguise to sound Falstaff: did you not?
she be otherwise, 'tis labour well bestowed. Page. Yes; and you heard what the other told
(Exit. Ford. Do you think there is truth in them?
SCENE II.-A Room in the Garter Inn. Page. Hang'em, slaves! I do not think the knight would offer it: but these that accuse him
Enter FALSTAFF and PISTOL. in his intent towards our wives, are a yoke of Fal. I will not lend thee a penny. his discarded men; very rogues, now they be Pist. Why, then the world's mine oyster, out of service.
Which I with sword will open.Ford. Were they his men ?
I will retort the sum in equipage. Page. Marry, were they.
Fal. Not a penny. I have been content, sir, Ford, I like it never the better for that.-Does you should lay my countenance to pawn: I have he lie at the Garter?
grated upon my good friends for three reprieves Page. Ay, marry, does he. If he should intend for you and your coach-fellow Nym; or else you this voyage towards my wife, I would turn her had looked through the grate like a gemins of loose to him; and what he gets more of her than baboons. I am damned in hell, for swearing to sharp words, let it lie on my head.
gentlemen my friends, you were good soldiers, Ford. I do not misdoubt my wife; but I would and tall fellows; and when mistress Bridget lost be loath to turn them together: a man may be the handle of her fan, I took't upon mine honour, too confident: I would have nothing lie on my thou hadst it not.
[fifteen pence? head; I cannot be thus satisfied.
Pist. Didst thou not share ? hadst thou not Page. Look, where my ranting host of the
Fol. Reason, you rogue, reason:
Think'st Garter comes: there is either liquor in his pate, thou, I'll endanger my soul gratis? At a word, or money in his purse, when he looks so merrily. hang no more about me, I am no gibbet for you -How now, mine host?
--90.- A short knife and a throng:-to your maEnter Host and SHALLOW.
nor of Pickthatch, go.--You'll not bear a letter Host. How now, bully-rook? thou'rt a gentle- for me, you rogne ? you stand upon your honour! wan: cavalero-justice, I say.
- Why, thou unconfinable baseness,it is as much Shal. I follow, mine host, I follow.--Good as I can do to keep the terms of my honour even, and twenty, good master Page! Master pr.:rise. I, I, I myself sometimes, leaving the Page, will you go with us? we have sport in fear of heaven on the left hand, and hiding mine hand.
honour in my necessity, and fain to shuffle, to Host. Tell him, cavalero-justice; tell him, hedge, and to lurch; and yet, you, rogur, will bully-rook.
ensconce your rags, your cat-a-mountain looks, Shal. Sir, there is a fray to be fought, between your red-lattice phrases, and your bold-beating Sir Hugh the Welsh priest, and Caius the French oaths, under the shelter of your honour ! You doctor.
will not do it, you? Ford. Good mine host of the Garter, a word Pist. I do relent; what would'st thou more of with you, Host. What say'st thou, bully-rook ?
Enter ROBIN. [They go aside.
Rob. Sir, here's a woman would speak with Shal. Will you (to PAGE] go with us to behold
Fal. Let her approach.
[you. it? my merry host hath had the measuring of
Enter MISTRESS QUICKLY. their weapons; and, I think he hath appointed Quick. Give your worship good-morrow, them contrary places: for believe me, I hear Fal. Good-morrow, good wife. the parson is no jester. Hark, I will tell you Quick. Not so, an't please your worship. what our sport shall be.
Fal. Good maid, then.