Fal. Well, sirs, I am almost out at heels.

Pist. Why, then, let kibes ensue.

Fal. There is no remedy; I must cony-catch; I must shift.

Pist. Young ravens must have food.

Fal. Which of you know Ford of this town?

Pist. I ken the wight: he is of substance good.

Fal. My honest lads, I will tell you what I am about.
Pist. Two yards, and more.

Fal. No quips now, Pistol :-indeed, I am in the waist two yards about; but I am now about no waste; I am about thrift. Briefly, I do mean to make love to Ford's wife: I spy entertainment in her; she discourses, she carves,(11) she gives the leer of invitation: I can construe the action of her familiar style; and the hardest voice of her behaviour, to be Englished rightly, is, "I am Sir John Falstaff's."

Pist. He hath studied her well, and translated her well, (12) -out of honesty into English.

Nym. The anchor is deep: will that humour pass?

Fal. Now, the report goes she has all the rule of her husband's purse :-he hath a legion of angels. (13)

Pist. As many devils entertain; and, "To her, boy," say I.

Nym. The humour rises; it is good: humour me the angels.

Fal. I have writ me here a letter to her: and here another to Page's wife, who even now gave me good eyes too, examined my parts with most judicious œilliads; sometimes the beam of her view gilded my foot, sometimes my portly belly. Pist. Then did the sun on dunghill shine.

Nym. I thank thee for that humour.

:

Fal. O, she did so course o'er my exteriors with such a greedy intention, that the appetite of her eye did seem to scorch me up like a burning-glass! Here's another letter to her she bears the purse too; she is a region in Guiana, all gold and bounty. I will be cheater to them both,(14) and they shall be exchequers to me; they shall be my East and West Indies, and I will trade to them both. Go bear thou this letter to Mistress Page; and thou this to Mistress Ford: we will thrive, lads, we will thrive.

Pist. Shall I Sir Pandarus of Troy become,

And by my side wear steel? then, Lucifer take all!

Nym. I will run no base humour: here, take the humourletter: I will keep the haviour of reputation.

Fal. [to Robin] Hold, sirrah, bear you these letters tightly; Sail like my pinnace to the golden shores.-(15) [Exit Robin. Rogues, hence, avaunt! vanish like hailstones, go;

Trudge, plod away o' th' hoof;(16) seek shelter, pack!
Falstaff will learn the humour of the age,

French thrift, you rogues; myself and skirted page.

[Exit.

Pist. Let vultures gripe thy guts! for gourd and fullam

hold,

And high and low beguile the rich and poor:

Tester I'll have in pouch when thou shalt lack,
Base Phrygian Turk!

Nym. I have operations in my head, which be humours of

I will discuss the humour of this love to Page.

Pist. And I to Ford shall eke unfold

How Falstaff, varlet vile,

His dove will prove, his gold will hold,

And his soft couch defile.

Nym. My humour shall not cool: I will incense Page(18) to deal with poison; I will possess him with yellowness, for this revolt of mine(19) is dangerous: that is my true humour. Pist. Thou art the Mars of malcontents: I second thee; troop on.

[Exeunt.

SCENE IV. A room in DOCTOR CAIUS's house.

Enter MISTRESS QUICKLY and SIMPLE.

Quick. What, John Rugby!

Enter RUGBY.

I pray thee, go to the casement, and see if you can see my

master, Master Doctor Caius, coming. If he do, i̇' faith, and find any body in the house, here will be an old abusing of God's patience and the king's English.

Rug. I'll go watch.

Quick. Go; and we'll have a posset for't soon at night, in faith, at the latter end of a sea-coal fire. [Exit Rugby.] An honest, willing, kind fellow, as ever servant shall come in house withal; and, I warrant you, no tell-tale nor no breedbate his worst fault is, that he is given to prayer; he is something peevish that way: but nobody but has his fault; -but let that pass.-Peter Simple you say your name is? Sim. Ay, for fault of a better.

Quick. And Master Slender's your master?

Sim. Ay, forsooth.

Quick. Does he not wear a great round beard, like a glover's paring-knife?

Sim. No, forsooth: he hath but a little wee face, with a little yellow beard,-a Cain-coloured beard.

Quick. A softly-sprighted man, is he not?

Sim. Ay, forsooth: but he is as tall a man of his hands as any is between this and his head; he hath fought with a

warrener.

Quick. How say you?-O, I should remember him: does he not hold up his head, as it were, and strut in his gait? Sim. Yes, indeed, does he.

Quick. Well, heaven send Anne Page no worse fortune! Tell Master Parson Evans I will do what I can for your master: Anne is a good girl, and I wish—

Re-enter RUGBY.

Rug. Out, alas! here comes my master.

Quick. We shall all be shent. [Exit Rugby.]—Run in here, good young man; go into this closet:-he will not stay long. [Shuts Simple in the closet.]-What, John Rugby! John! what, John, I say! Go, John, go inquire for my master; I doubt he be not well, that he comes not home. [Sings. And down, down, adown-a, &c.

Enter DOCTOR CAIUS.

Caius. Vat is you sing? I do not like dese toys. Pray

you, go and vetch me in my closet un boitier vert,

(20)

a green-a box: do intend vat I speak? a green-a box.

-a box,

Quick. Ay, forsooth; I'll fetch it you.—[Aside] I am glad he went not in himself: if he had found the young man, he would have been horn-mad.

Caius. Fe, fe, fe, fe! ma foi, il fait fort chaud. Je m'en vais à la cour,-la grande affaire.

Quick. Is it this, sir?

Caius. Oui; mette le au mon pocket: dépêche, quickly.Vere is dat knave Rugby?

Quick. What, John Rugby! John'

Rug. Here, sir.

Re-enter RUGBY.

Caius. You are John Rugby, and you are Jack Rugby. (21) Come, take-a your rapier, and come after my heel to de

court.

Rug. 'Tis ready, sir, here in the porch.

Caius. By my trot, I tarry too long. -Od's me! Qu'aij'oublié! dere is some simples in my closet, dat I vill not for de varld I shall leave behind.

Quick. Ay me, he'll find the young man there, and be mad! Caius. O diable, diable! vat is in my closet? Villain! larron (22) [Pulling Simple out.]—Rugby, my rapier! Quick. Good master, be content.

Caius. Verefore shall I be content-a?

Quick. The young man is an honest man.

Caius. Vat shall de honest man do in my closet? dere is no honest man dat shall come in my closet.

Quick. I beseech you, be not so phlegmatic. Hear the truth of it: he came of an errand to me from Parson Hugh. Caius. Vell.

Sim. Ay, forsooth; to desire her to—

Quick. Peace, I pray you.

Caius. Peace-a your tongue.-Speak-a your tale.

Sim. To desire this honest gentlewoman, your maid, to speak a good word to Mistress Anne Page for my master in the way of marriage.

Quick. This is all, indeed, la; but I'll ne'er put my finger in the fire, and need not.

Caius. Sir Hugh send-a you?-Rugby, baillez me some paper.-Tarry you a little-a while.

[Writes. Quick. I am glad he is so quiet: if he had been throughly moved, you should have heard him so loud and so melancholy. -But notwithstanding, man, I'll do for your(23) master what good I can and the very yea and the no is, the French doctor, my master,-I may call him my master, look you, for I keep his house; and I wash, wring, brew, bake, scour, dress meat and drink, make the beds, and do all myself,—

Sim. 'Tis a great charge to come under one body's hand. Quick. Are you avised o' that? you shall find it a great charge and to be up early and down late;-but notwithstanding, to tell you in your ear,-I would have no words of it,—my master himself is in love with Mistress Anne Page: but notwithstanding that, I know Anne's mind,-that's neither here nor there.

Caius. You jack'nape,-give-a dis letter to Sir Hugh; by gar, it is a shallenge: I vill cut his troat in de park; and I vill teach a scurvy jack-a-nape priest to meddle or make:you may be gone; it is not good you tarry here:-by gar, I vill cut all his two stones; by gar, he shall not have a stone to trow at his dog. [Exit Simple.

Quick. Alas, he speaks but for his friend.

Caius. It is no matter-a for dat:-do not you tell-a me dat I shall have Anne Page for myself?(24)—by gar, I vill kill de Jack priest; and I have appointed mine host of de Jarteer to measure our weapon :-by gar, I vill myself have Anne Page.

Quick. Sir, the maid loves you, and all shall be well. We must give folks leave to prate: what, the good-jer!

Caius. Rugby, come to de court vit me. By gar, if I have not Anne Page, I shall turn your head out of my door. -Follow my heels, Rugby. [Exeunt Caius and Rugby. Quick. You shall have An fool's-head of your own. No, I know Anne's mind for that: never a woman in Windsor knows more of Anne's mind than I do; nor can do more than I do with her, I thank heaven.

Fent. [within] Who's within there? ho!

Quick. Who's there, I trow? Come near the house, I

pray you.