TWO BLANKS TO A PRIZE. 25 Thus did this cloud of darkness daily shade The building for the Lord's Annointed made, And blacken'd it, like pall's, that grace a burying: Thus was this Man of Mud and straw employ'd, And, at the thought so wicked overjoy'd, Of smoaking his liege sov'reign like a Herring : Of serving him, as we do parts of swine, Thought, with green peas, a dish extremely fine. But lo! this baneful Rogue of brick, Fell, for his sov'reign, fortunately sick, And, ere the wretch could please his spleen and pride, Of turning Monarchs into bacon-dy'd. TWO BLANKS TO A PRIZE. In the lott'ry of life. lest dame fortune beguile, If a husband you'd take, miss-or you sir, a wife, And if for preferment, you're striving at court, Then your chance is not worth, sir, three fourths of a groat: There are ninety-two blanks to a prize! D HUMANITY AND INGRATITUDE. (FRENEAU.) By the side of the sea, in a cottage obscure, There lived an old fellow named Charlot Boncoeur, Who was free to his neighbour and good to the poor, Catching fish was his trade, And all people said, That mischief to nothing but fish he design'd, One day as he went to the brink of the lake, An unfortunate wight who was drowning, or drowned. That the man to the surface once more might ascend And managed so well, That soon to the margin the carcase was drawn, And who should it be but his old neighbour JOHN! Now, some how or other, it pop'd in his head, That in spite of his drowning the man was not dead, And while he was thinking what means to devise That his friend might recover and open his eyes, He saw with vexation and sorrow, no doubt, That, in lugging him up, he had put one eye out― However, convinced, from what he had heard, That John might be living, for aught that appear'd; To his cottage he took him, and there had him bled, Rubb'd, roll'd on a barrel, and then put to bed: HUMANITY AND INGRATITUDE. So in less than a week (to his praise be it said) 17 But when John had begun to travel about, He was sadly chagrined that his eye was put out, And forgetting what service his neighbour had done him, Went off to a lawyer, and clapt a writ on him; Talked much of the value of what he had lost, That Charlot must pay all the damage and cost, And if with such sentence he would not comply, He swore he would have his identical eye. That Charlot was vexed, we hardly need say, Yet he urged what he could in a moderate way, Declared to the judges, by way of defence, That the action was wrought without malice pre pense; That his conscience excus'd him for what he had done; That fortune was only to blame-and that John Might have thought himself happy (when death was so nigh) To purchase his life with the loss of an eye- In answer to all the defendant's fine pleading, John said He had never yet found in his reading, A people, or nation, or senator sage, Or a law, or a custom, in whatever age, 28 HUMANITY AND INGRATITUDE. Undertook to decide on this weighty affair; And cry'd, 'Can you doubt in a case that's so plain? That Charlot manœuvred with so little skill, If he get out alone from where Charlot got him, sentence That Charlot be punished and brought to repentance. The audience were struck with a world of surprise John finding that matters had took a wrong turn, Not waiting to see if the court would adjourn, Sneaked out of the house, with a hiss of disgrace, In dread lest the sentence should quickly take place, Grown pliant at last, his cause he withdrew-His plea was so bad and his friends were so few; It was needless, he thought on the cast of a die To venture bis life for the sake of an eye. And concluded 'twas better to give up the suit, Than risk the one left, and be smothered to boot. THE MONKEY, WHO SHAVED HIMSELF AND HIS FRIENDS. A FABLE. A MAN who own'd a barber's shop (HUMPHREYS.) It chanc'd, in shop the dog and cat, The dog runs howling round and bleeding. Nor yet was tir'd, our roguish elf: Then with left hand holds smooth his jaw ;- Around he flourishes and slashes, |