Where Christian and Jew,

And the devil knows who!

Shall complete my edition of Babel.

As no priest 's in the place,
Let Nic's Chaplain say grace,
To quiet some scrupulous laymen;
And little Jack Gorgon,*

My orator, organ!

Shall piously chuckle forth" Amen."

"Tis pleasant enough,

Tho' the mutton run tough,

To see how the rogues tooth and nail it!
Like flies in a shamble,

They join in the scramble,

With appetite good-what should ail it?

Lest brandy, or rum,
Should intoxicate some,

I banish them both, with Geneva;

Instead of blue-ruin,

We've Adam's own brewing—

A much better drink, by your leave-a!

* The sometime profane Sunday Jack-Pudding of the Sans Souci :-The Fox that had lost its Tail!

As soon as my spinners

Have finish'd their dinners,

(Soup-maigre, if beef they'd the last time,) The girls, for ten minutes,

Shall play on their spinnets;

The boys dance a hornpipe for pastime.

The old men and women

I'll treat with the skimming
Of some philosophical question;
Abernethy, queer chap!

Says an afternoon nap

Is an excellent thing for digestion!

I'll tell the good folk,

That religion's a joke,

And offer my own, as a sample ;

That man is a brute,

Is beyond a dispute;

My friend, little Jack! for example.

That vice is a name,

And that virtue's the same,
Deserving nor censure, nor credit—
See, my "Essay,"* in print,

Essay on human character-proving (?) that the character is made for the man-Ergo-Man is not a responsible being.

Yet I'll give 'em the hint,

As few but myself, may have read it.

Economy's this,

No advantage to miss-
Philanthropy too, is no stickler;
Its favourite dish is

The loaves and the fishes;
Taking care of itself in partic'lar!

And liberty also,

At least what I call so!

Binds only mankind in my slavery—

* The following Ode has been attributed to a distinguished disciple of the "New View." It is entitled

NUMBER ONE.

FHILANTHROPIST! for prudence' sake,

As thro' life's thorny vale you run;
Whate'er you do, be sure to take
Especial care of Number One.

Profession's easy, words are cheap,
A thing is sooner said, than done;
Abroad, at home; awake, asleep;
Still keep your eye on Number One!

The Indian worships wood and stone,
The fiery fanatic, the sun;

The Liberal's god, is, Self alone,

And what is Self-but Number One?

And honesty true,

Is right worshipful too,

When a man can get nothing by knavery!

Equality's crown

Is to level all down,

Who in fame or in fortune o'ercrow us;

And then, vice versa,

To grind without mercy,

The poor needy devils below us!

Liberality next,

Is the Quaker's old text

My son,

if of wisdom thou'st any,

Thou'lt always be found,

To make sure of a pound, Before thou dost part with a penny!

The bosom that grieves,

And the hand that relieves, At pity's soft impulse, is erring : I laugh at the flat,

Who would throw out a sprat, Unless he can pull up a herring!

Fine feeling's a hum,

And a hoax-" Homo sum,"

Mere school-boy romance, rhodomontade;

We stoics, "jam satis,"

Think advice, given gratis,

Enough for poor folks, when they want aid.

The Owenite rule,

Is be cautious, and cool, Indiff'rent to all things, and all men ;

Your mind, in a freak,

Never venture to speak;

Truth spoke out of time, may enthral men.

In all that you do,

Let a sinister view

Be your counsel, your guide, and director;

In all that you say,

Go the round-about way,

So ends the first part of my lecture!

I hold it imprudent,

To drive the young student Up Learning's ascent by coercion ;

Or e'en to encourage,

Beyond his pease-porridge,

The task he should learn-for diversion!

My blockheads I teach,

Without birching their breech,

By a method that well may surprise one ;—

R